People Never Cease To Amaze Me!!


Its been an awfully long time since I have written anything on this site and it kind of makes me sad. Life has, as always, been hectic but even more so now that I am a full-time college student and single mother of two. Still, this site has been my outlet for so long that I don’t want to just forget about it and have it fade away… So I am here now, and I am going to try to be here somewhat regularly to post and vent and share all of my crazy thoughts and ideas. Which is probably a good idea since bottling them up makes me crazy and saying them out loud in public can sometimes get me into trouble…

So on to the thoughts I am having this moment that brought me here in the first place…

I haven’t been sleeping well lately.. Okay let’s be honest, I have not slept well since my daughter was born 4 years ago but lately it has been really bad. I wake up several times a night and for a while when it first started happening I would lay there trying to force myself back to sleep but all that did was make me frustrated and spin the psychotic scenario wheels inside my head. So, lately I have taken to getting up out of bed and actually doing things until I feel tired again… Some nights it works and I am back in bed in a couple of hours, other nights I am up for the day from 3 am on… Those days are super fun, let me tell you.. and they create this nap, awake late, can’t sleep, nap cycle that is even worse than not being able to sleep in the first place…

Anyway.. Not sleeping is not the topic I am aiming to talk about here so let me get back on track.

While I am awake in the wee hours of the morning/night I tend to browse Facebook and other online sites for funny, stupid, entertaining and overall interesting information. Sometimes it melts my brain into mush, sometimes I learn something amazing and sometimes I am touched by the kindness of humanity… but other times I am appalled..

Today was one of those days. 

I came across a post on Facebook and it was a picture that a mother has posted of her son it had caption that stated his name and age (I think he was 3 or 4) and went on to explain that he likes to wear dresses and play with dolls and that she was perfectly okay with that. She said she wanted her son to know that he could be whatever he wanted and basically that she didn’t want the superficial constraints of society to determine his gender norms. She simply wanted her son to be happy and to do what made him happy…

This is NOT what appalled me… 

What appalled me was the pathetic response from the public about how she should be raising her child, how what she is doing is abusive, how she is going to “turn him gay” and how he is doomed to be bullied…

Seriously???

I have the utmost respect for this woman and any parent that can embrace their child’s choices so openly. I am sure it is not an easy task to watch your son walk around in a floral sundress but accepting that it is his choice, his right if you will, is an amazing act of parenting if you ask me.

This mother is not going to “turn her son gay”, I guess the person that posted this comment missed the memo but BEING GAY IS NOT A CHOICE!

Nor is she is not setting him up or dooming him to a life of being bullied.. EVEN IF he is still wearing dresses when he goes to school this doesn’t mean he is going to be teased anymore than anyone else..

And besides, maybe the person that commented this should consider Support Transgendertalking to their kids about gender variance and bullying so that hopefully ‘the boy in the dress’ won’t be bullied…

Kids can be mean but they are bullies because they are not taught to accept differences, or they are lacking attention, or because of some other outside factor.. Kids are not naturally bullies; we are not born with the mindset to discriminate, it is created over time in various ways. In fact, much of the time it is the parents attitudes and opinions coming out of the children’s  mouths…

There were of course the expected comments about God Hating Gays and the Bible verses to go with them. I am not religious so I can not hurl verses back that I am sure exist saying “do not judge”, or “love is love in any form” or something of that nature.. But what I can say is that the Bible is pretty damn old and the world has changed a great deal since these “rules” were created.. Don’t you think that God, who apparently created the world, would probably adapt his rules and opinions to fit the ever-changing ways of humanity??? Or in the very least strike every gay person down with a bolt of lightning if he truly did hate them so much!!!

Just sayin’.

My point here, other than ranting and raving, is that every once in a while I come across a post or comments that truly make me sad. People live inside little boxes and refuse to consider anything that doesn’t fit perfectly inside. When we live like this the only person we are harming is ourselves and the only ones that suffer are the future generations who have been taught that everything has to fit perfectly inside their little box.

Until Next Time…

Be Yourself; Explore Yourself.
Ps. There is a great post on gender variance in MacLean’s Magazine for anyone that is interested in the topic. You can access it HERE

Just Another Day in Creepsville


Those of you that know me personally know that I do not really look my age (30…Ah!). At 5 Feet tall and 100 pounds, I often get mistaken for a teenager from a distance and I am carded regularly when trying to buy liquor. (Which of course, is very flattering, but I do not believe for one second that I look that young!) Still, the point is I tend to look like a young woman (especially since I lack the boobs to be anything else, and sometimes the maturity level is questionable…) and this fact is not always a good thing.

Enter Creepsville. 2013-03-04_00-26-172

Creepsville is the place where all those wonky men come from that just do not seem to have the tact required to approach a woman. It is the place that houses those males that say all the wrong things, stalk, prowl the streets for a date, or hover too close in the clubs. Basically, Creepsville is where the Creeps come from… And they always seem to come to me.

Just the other morning I was on my way to pick up my daughter from her dads after their weekly ‘me’ time. The weather was warm, and it was a Sunday morning so I knew that taking a bus would be utter BS (the transit in my city is a disaster, but that is another post for another time) Anyways… I was wearing blue jeans, a green tank top, and running shoes (that belong to my 10 year-old son btw) I was by no means dressed in a provocative manner, or looking like a whore.

Yet as I was cruising along with my Ipod blasting Britney Spears in my ears I noticed a very nice truck pass by me on one of the main streets not far from my house. I am a big fan of big trucks and this one was flashy (something I thought I would look really good in)…

The walk from my house to my daughters dad’s takes me approximately 30 – 40 minutes (and I am a fast walker) It is located downtown and I live uptown so I usually follow the main roads and take a few smaller residential one in between working my way down diagonally.

The truck passed by and I went about my mission humming to myself and imagining I was famous inside my head. A few blocks down the road I noticed a really nice truck, and then another, and then another and I thought to myself… There is NO F**KING way that many people drive the same really nice truck in a small city this size… (Yep, I am blonde did I mention that)

Needless to say I started to pay attention to what was happening around me at this point and noticed the truck go by another two times before it passed me and turned down a side road ahead. As I crossed the road it had turned down I noticed it reversing in order to come back my way and I decided to pull out my phone and text my kids dad. I told him I thought someone was following me (realizing after I sent it how paranoid that would sound). At this point I was walking past two schools that are located right across from one another, which means there are no houses there and I am stuck between a road and a chain link fence. I thought to myself… This wacko is going to pull up right here and I am trapped… Sure enough that’s what happened.

I look over and there is this large truck coming to a stop beside me, its window rolling down and the driver leaning in to talk… I took a quick look around and realized that the nearest witness was a older couple on a porch across the football field and over two fences.

Turning to the driver I was surprised to hear him say, “Listen, I had to ask, do you want to come out on my boat with me today?”

LIKE, ARE YOU F**KING SERIOUS!!!!???

Let me think about this for a second….. Hmmm… Do I want to hop in a big truck with a strange man who plans to take me out in his boat to a deserted lake somewhere??? Tempting right???? HA!

I actually asked him if he was serious…. That is how unserious I thought he was… I was looking around for Ashton Kutcher, I was sure I was being punked…

Instead…

“Is this what you do? Drive around looking for young girls on Sunday morning’s on their way home from church? Seriously?

I gotta say, since you were stalking me for the last 18 blocks I already had a good description of your vehicle to give the police, including your licence plate number, and now I have a fairly detailed one of you as well… Including the wedding band on your left hand… So listen buddy you should probably go home to your wife.”

Funny, he didn’t seem interested in a boat ride with me after that…..?

I thought that I should share this though as a warning (I am being serious for a second) Perhaps he was just a nice guy who liked the look of my ass and really did just wanna take me out on a ‘boat’ trip, but I highly doubt it and the situation was weird enough to creep me out (not a simple thing to accomplish) so there was more to it than that. Normal men do not follow a woman for several blocks and creep her out in order to get a date. They also have enough sense to realize that a normal woman is not going to hop in a car with a stranger (and certainly not a boat). Normal men do not prowl the streets at 9am on a Sunday morning and stop to chat with girls that apparently look 18 (and that day I really did look a LOT younger than I truly am) No, this was a creep from Creepsville and they are everywhere. So educate yourself and learn to protect yourself (even if it is simply with a strong attitude and a big voice… remember most predators want easy prey and are more likely to pass on someone who seems like they will put up a fight or cause a scene) Seriously, as humorous as this situation was to me, it would not have been funny at all if it were my niece or daughter, or someone else’s daughter that was not as big a BITCH as I am…

P.S. I did end up contacting the police and gave a good description.. Although I didn’t actually have the licence plate number and truly have no clue if there really was ring on his left hand… but he looked at it when I said it and left pretty quick so I am assuming it was a smart comment to make… 

My Narcissistic World!


I haven’t had much to say lately… Okay that’s a lie, I have had a lot to ‘say’ but nothing to write.

My life, as always, has been a strange fusion of chaos and calamity still somehow causing extreme bouts of boredom. Perhaps it is the chaos itself that I am bored of… because despite all the chaos that constantly surrounds me, I find my life very mundane. Sure there are chores to do, children to care for and other important items that should be complete, but let’s be serious these things are not there to humor me, they have been put in place simply to drive me nuts. Even in the midst of catastrophe, which occurs often in my life, I am not overly entertained.

I think I need a hobby, or a crap load of money, wine and illegal narcotics… something, because as of late, even my imagination seems to have fallen asleep at the wheel, and my ability to amuse myself has been lost among the endless loads of dirty laundry.

In an ideal world I would travel, I would visit exotic lands. I would write books that would change people’s lives, and tour with Oprah as she battles to change the world.

In an ideal world I would have a nanny, a housekeeper and a chef. I would have a well stocked wine cellar and a drunken’ smile plastered on my face.

In an ideal world it would always be summer, because having to bundle up really bums me out. I would live on the beach and I would never have to work again.

In an ideal world I would never be bored like I constantly am, I would have a personal assistant to handle all my problems, and a group of others whose sole purpose is simply finding ways to keep me amused.

In an ideal world I would have top of the line electronics, robotic appliances and fancy cars. I would have breakfast in Paris, lunch in Hawaii and Dinner in Italy.

In an ideal world I would have a private jet, and my own petting zoo. (With people to care for the animals of course) I would have a walk-in closet the size of a small house and the perfect clothes to fill it, my shoes and bags would have their own room, and my kids would have their own private wing!

Sure, I’m a little narcissistic, but Hell it’s MY ideal world and I’ll enjoy it the way I want to!!!

12 Simple Lessons That Will Make Life a Little Easier (for everyone)


Well it has been a long and tiresome battle the last few months, but I can finally say that I have reached the light beyond the horizon…. I have barely had a moment to myself over the last while and the toll it has taken on my mind is indescribable. After a long hard journey, lots of stress and the odd dramatic outburst, I think I deserve a little break! And that is exactly what I am doing at this moment… Kicked back in my leather reclining rocker with my feet up and my laptop rested at my fingertips, I am basking in the sun that is shining in the window and enjoying the silence I have at this moment. (which is a very rare thing in my house) Its been awhile since I have had either the energy, or the inspiration to write and it actually feels good to being doing so right now.

I can honestly say that through all the trials, drama, moving and chaos I have learned a great many things over the last year, simple little lessons that can make or break a person’s soul. So as I sit here, back in my ‘small city” home where I belong, far away from the constant chaos of the ‘big city” life I left behind, I will share with you these lessons in the hopes that I may (by chance) save someone else a great deal of stress and heartache by making the same mistakes I have over time…

12 Simple Lessons That Will Make Life Easier, For Everyone!

  1. You may not ‘think’ you like your life, but it’s really not that bad – You have all heard the saying ‘The grass is always greener on the other side’ but what no one ever seems to consider is that perhaps the grass is greener because there is more fertilizer on that side of the fence… A.k.a. More shit on the lawn! Look for happiness in what you have, not that which you desire. Always remember that what you have now was what you once longed for!
  2. Gossip will get you nowhere – Not only does gossip get you nowhere, it gets you nowhere alone without any friends. If you wouldn’t say it confidently and comfortably to someone’s face, don’t say it at all. Mama was right when she said, if you don’t have anything nice to say don’t say anything. Besides, the person you are gossiping with now is probably gossiping about you to someone else as well.
  3. Real friends are hard to find – You may think you know someone well. You may consider them a dear friend, but the truth is that ‘true‘ friends are few and far between. It is a sad fact of life that most people are out only for themselves, so if you find a real friend that is there when you need them most and does not expect anything in return, hold them close and never let them go. Surround yourself with people who compliment who you are and bring something positive to your life. Get rid of the ones that don’t and never feel bad about doing so. You wouldn’t do something that makes you feel bad on a regular basis, so don’t keep company that doesn’t make you feel good either.
  4. You are the most important person in your life – You might think that family or children come first, but the truth is “it’s all about you.” Without taking care of yourself, you are not going to be able to take care of those you care about. Be sure to treat yourself with the love and respect you deserve so that you are in your best shape to deal with all the other important things, and people, in your life. There is nothing wrong with being selfish, if you don’t love you who will?
  5. Your partner needs to know they are lovedAppreciation is a major part of a healthy relationship. People will give and give as long as they know it is being done for a reason, but without acknowledgement and appreciation they can only give so much. Be sure that you take the time to show your partner how much you love and appreciate them regularly and without expectation. Keep in mind how good you feel when you know you are loved and appreciated and share that joy with the ones you love.
  6. Children can make you smile even in the worst of times – Even when the world is falling down around you and it seems there is no silver lining in sight, children has this amazing ability to make you smile. Be sure that you are never to busy to take a moment and appreciate the joy that they can bring to your life. Whether they are your own, or you have to borrow someone else’s, take the time to share some joy with a child and you will find that life is never as bad as it seems.
  7. Material things will not make you happy – No matter how big your T.V how nice your furniture, or how fancy your house, material things are not going to make you happy. You can shop until you drop, but if you are not fulfilled in other aspects of your life these purchase are going to be made in vain. What good is a huge house if it is empty? What’s the point of a fast car if you have nowhere to drive it? Pretty things are not pretty locked away from the world. Any way you look at it, things are just things and without true happiness they mean nothing.
  8. Money is not everything – As with material things money is not going to make you happy so don’t kill yourself trying to figure that out.
  9. Having money can save a lot of stress – Although money is not going to make you happy, it can combat stress. Having enough money to survive comfortably is a great stress relief, this is especially true for people in relationships. Most marital spats are centered around financial issues and it is one of the major causes of both divorce and depression in many. This is not to say you will be stress free if you are rich, and it is not saying you need to be rich at all, but good budgeting and a secure savings will help alleviate stress and make life a little easier in one aspect.
  10. You must work and play equally – Burning the candle at both ends when it comes to your career might gain you success in your field, but it wont do anything for your social life. Studies show that in order to be truly content with your life you must have balance between work and play. Instead of busting your butt trying to be number one at work, try to be number one to yourself, do what makes you happy, forget everything else and focus on being content and well-rounded. This approach will save you large amounts of stress, and may very well change your current path in life.
  11.  Everything happens for a reason – Even in the darkest clouds there is a silver lining. No matter what happens in your life you need to look at it as a lesson and learn from it. This is not to say that you should ‘let go and move on’ like some people suggest, quite the contrary, some lessons are lengthy and take time to learn. Just like algebra, more complex lessons require more detailed study. This just means that you need to see the positive in everything that happens in life, even in the worst situations there is something great that can be learned, all you have to do is look for the lesson and be open to accepting it. Don’t see an issue as an obstacle, see it as a challenge and face it willingly with an open mind.
  12. You must let go of the American Dream This is probably the most important thing you will ever do in life. Letting go of the American Dream can easily change your life. A big house, perfect career, loving partner, 2.5 kids and a dog may suit some, but it doesn’t suit everyone and it is high time you accept it if it doesn’t suit you. Instead of trying to keep up with the Joneses focus on keeping yourself content. For some this may mean marriage, kids and all the works. It may mean owning a tattoo parlor and piercing your eyelids. Whatever the case, live YOUR dream, not the one that society says is perfect or you will never ‘truly’ be happy in life.

Life has a funny way of sneaking up on you when you least expect it, all you can really do is accept it with open arms. Take time to appreciate all the little things it has to offer and never let a moment pass without being thankful for all the blessings that surround you each day. Even those that suffer through the worst situations can be thankful to be alive. We only get one chance at this life, make it matter to “you.”

 

Do you have any tips, lessons or advice to make life easier? What are some of the rules you live by? Share your thoughts and tips in the comment section below. 

 

Cheers.

 

Questions, Comments, Inquiries and Submissions can be sent to:
chasek8@live.ca

A Word on Comment Etiquette


I thought I would take a moment out of my day to write a quick post about proper comment etiquette. Now I am not going to claim to be an expert on the topic, I don’t claim to be an expert on any topic, but I do consider myself to have a high level of Customer Service skills and common sense. Combined with a strong opinion I feel that I am able enough to write this post….

Recently on one of my other blogs a reader commented on an error in my spelling which I appreciated openly. I was unable to fix the error at that moment, but have since revised so that it is correct. While checking my emails today and moderating my comments I came across a comment from another reader, pointing out an error in the original comment about my error… This was not an issue, what WAS an issue is that ‘this’ reader went on to be vulgar and foul in his/her comment and unnecessarily rude in general regarding both errors that were made. Thankfully I have my site set up to moderate comments before they are posted and I caught this before it hit the site, but it got me to thinking about the proper etiquette of commenting and the basic rules that people should follow.

The following are ‘MY’ personal guidelines, and are not meant to be ‘pushed’ on anyone. Feel free to add you own as well and share any tips, tricks or stories you might have in the comments section of this page.

 The Basics of Comment Etiquette:

  • First and foremost, keep it clean. When you are commenting on someone’s blog post, or on any site, it is important to remember that people of all ages may read the content on the site. Keep your comments free of foul language or sexual content unless you are sure the site is for a mature audience only.
  • Secondly, say to others only what you would appreciate hearing yourself. It is fine to point out an error, disagree with a view, or propose an opposition, but do so with tact. Swearing, belittling or general put-downs are not polite and I am sure you would not appreciate them on your site, why would you want to put them on someone else’s?
  • Commenting should enhance the post, share the love, or propose an opposite opinion. Disagreements, debates and even arguments are fine as long as they are done tastefully and neither side is trying to make the other look bad. It is important that you remember your comments are in black and white, like texting there is no emotion shown on the screen. Be careful with your choice of words as many times what you mean to say gets interpreted very differently than it should by incorrect word choice. Avoid aggressive words and remember to use “I” to show the readers that you are simply sharing your opinion.
  • Use comments as a line of communication. Comments on a post make the writer proud and often time comments encourage more writing. Use commenting to show your support for the site and to help bring traffic to your own. Posting a comment saying that you enjoyed the post is wonderful and it encourages the writer to not only reply to your comment, but to write more content as well. Positive feed back is motivating.
  • Remember that each thing you say is a reflection of your own site. Posting a foul comment on a blog you read only reflects on you. Each comment you post holds a link to your own blog site, or other place on the internet. Keep in mind that if you want to appear professional online you need to think before you type. People are not going to want to visit your site if they see vulgar comments written by you on another blog.
  • Avoid spamming people. Though commenting on other blogs helps to generate traffic to your own site avoid spamming blogs with your own link. If you want to place your link on a site it is best to first post a useful comment, and/or use the link only for relative material that relates to the post you have just read.
  • Share your thoughts and show the writer that you actually ‘read’ their post by writing a more in-depth comment than ‘good post’. Though ‘good post’ is a great pick-me-up, writers like to know what it was that you thought was ‘good’ about it. Try elaborating on your comments to make them more personal.

I am going to leave it at that for the moment, as I am sure that many of us don’t need this basic advice, but for those of you who do feel the need to be foul on other’s posts remember these actions reflect more on you than they do the writer…. Just a thought!

 

Cheers!

I Owe Toronto an Apology…


14 01 07 - Toronto Glitters

Image by Cliph via Flickr

Well, I admit it. I owe Toronto and apology! Apologizing and admitting that I was wrong have never really been my strong suit, but this time I think it is deserving. For many months now I have been ranting and raving about the bad parts of city living, and I have discovered that I am wrong… Yes, I said it. I am wrong! I admit it openly here for the world  see in black and white. (Wipe that smug smile off your face and I will explain myself. Oh, and don’t get comfortable with my apologies there won’t be many more…)

As I said, I have been ranting and raving about all the negatives that come along with city living. I have gone on and on about Toronto and the level of ignorance that the people here have… Now although much of what I said still holds strong, I owe an apology because my opinion was narrow-minded and I was not appreciating all the good this city has to offer.

For the last few weeks I have been going out of my way to travel and explore this city of 5.5 million people and I have discovered, and learned, many things.

  • I have learned that not everyone in Toronto is ignorant and self-absorbed. Though there are a great many of people who could benefit from common courtesy classes, not everyone is in it only for themselves, and there are a few kind souls in this city. I learned this by travelling alone with my children and trying to struggle to get up stairs at the subway stations. I will say a great number of people did walk (barge) right by us, but there were a number of passers-by that offered assistance as I struggled and even a few that went completely out of their way to help. I have to say that although many Toronto dwellers are cold and closed off, there are many people out there that are friendly and caring. I apologize to those people and only hope that their compassion and care rubs off on the rest.. and btw To all the rude people: Would it really kill you to smile, say hi, or step aside once in a while? Hold a door for someone, or offer up your seat? Take a second to be friendly, it might change your life… or someone else’s! 
  • I have learned that this city truly is beautiful. Though at times I feel like I am lost in a jungle of concrete buildings where heat seems to swell up from the depths of hell, there are parts of this city that are truly amazing. There are ample amounts of parks to enjoy, beautiful buildings to see and streets to explore. There is amazing art, diverse culture and every corner is like stepping into a whole new world. For not opening my eyes to the beauty before, I apologize, but for those of you that throw your trash on the side walks… pick it up and go to hell.
  • I have learned that although the traffic is bad, and the transit is packed it is a good system. The Toronto transit is one of the best, it is rarely running late and you never have to wait long. So, although I would avoid driving here at all costs, and I don’t much care for the transit because of all the people, when I do take the transit I don’t have to wait long and it is easy to use. For that I am thankful and I will apologize (partially, because many people here really don’t know how to drive and I am NOT sorry for saying that… The gas in on the ‘right’ people and yo u don’t need to constantly honk your horns!!)
  • I have learned that it is not the worst place in the world to live and that if you look you can find great deals. Just the other day I was complaining about the cost of living in the city, now I admit there are some prices here that will shock you to your core… I saw a one bedroom apartment yesterday that was listed at $2,900.00 per month and I almost died, but I have discovered that when you look for a deal there is one to be found in this city on almost anything… From books, to beds, to houses and cars the competition in this city means great deals for the penny savvy shopper. Set out to scour a deal and you will find one that pleases you. You may have to compromise, but you will find what you are looking for in the long run. So for this I apologize as well.
  • Lastly, I have learned that being in Toronto is like seeing the entire world all in one place. This city is probably one of the most diverse in the entire world. There are people from all walks of life moving along together. Each corner you turn brings you new smells, sights and sensations. There is culture and diversity like nothing I have ever seen, and it makes exploring this city an amazing adventure every time you step out your door. For this I am thankful… and I guess I apologize.
So there you have it Toronto. I have learned to appreciate many things in the last few weeks… I have seen that Toronto truly can be an amazing place. I will tell you that there are still a great deal of things I don’t like about this city, and I will never be able to handle the crowds or the constant chaos, but there is beauty deep within this city that touches your soul. There is amazing history and endless exploration that I can appreciate and enjoy. So, I apologize Toronto and I am glad that I finally opened my eyes, and my mind, to the beauty that is this city!

To Give or Not to Give? Best and Worst Gifts for Teachers


Today was the last day of school for many kids around the world, for some the year is ending tomorrow. Depending on where you live and which school board you deal with, this often means pizza parties and games, summer vacation and family fun, it also means good-bye and, gifts?To give the teacher a gift or not to? That is a question a lot of parents ponder. For many, a teachers gift on the last day is a small way of saying thank-you, showing appreciation, and saying good-bye. Ultimately the choice is yours, this has always been tradition in my household, if you do decide to give a gift to your child‘s teacher there are a few tips you should keep in mind.

The Best and Worst Gifts for Teachers:

Gifts to Avoid Teachers, like all of us love getting presents but after a few years of teaching 20 children per class there are a few things they ‘don’t’ want to be given. Mugs, best teacher ornaments, and framed photo’s of your child are gifts to avoid. Look in any teachers cabinet and I am sure you will find an abundance of mugs declaring that they are #1 Teacher, or Teacher of the Year, mugs are great but 100 mugs are useless and impersonal. If you choose to give a gift at least put in some thought. Homemade or personalized T-Shirts are another gift to avoid, remember there is a large chance that you will get the wrong size, and who actually wears those things anyway… I am willing to bet it will end up on the rack at Goodwill before the summer break is over! More top gifts to avoid; live animals, stuffed animals, candles and liquor… just don’t do it!

Gifts Worth GivingIf you are going to give a gift, be sure you put some thought into it. No one needs 1000 candles, scented soaps or notepad sets, avoid the obvious and be creative. Homemade gifts might seem like a great idea, but teaching a child is different from ‘loving’ a child, your daughters artwork is only precious to ‘you’. Some great gifts to give the teacher include;

  • A charitable donation: avoid re-gifting with the gift of giving Plan Canada has some excellent gift options available that help provide education for under-privileged children around the world. Plan Canada will provide classroom education for one child when you give a donation of $15.00, Library in a Box for $60.00 and many other gift options to help educate children in third-world countries. They give you a printable gift receipt, and the donation can be made in another person’s name. It is a great way to help others and show your child’s teacher that you appreciate what they do. Another great option is to purchase a book for the school library and dedicate it to the teacher you are gifting, this not only shows your appreciation but helps children in the years to come. The school librarian will probably be able to inform you of any books on the school wish list so you can purchase one that they really need.
  • Homemade Options (if you must go there): If you simply must do a homemade gift for financial or other personal reasons, than do it with care. Children’s art work and lopsided bowls should be avoided at all costs, but potted plants and baked goods (if you can actually bake well) are acceptable. If you are opting for a homemade gift keep in mind that you usually don’t know the decor of the person’s home, and they usually have an abundance of artwork from their students already. Keep it simple, yet unique. Baked goods and food work because they are actually usable and can be enjoyed.
  • Create Memories: A great group gift option is a school year scrapbook. Get together with the other parents and put together a scrapbook of the year for the teacher to help the teacher remember the wonderful time she had teaching the students. Get creative, it’s a great way to share memories of the year without the teacher having to always have it on display. Quilting or sewing a blanket full of memories is another great gift option if you have that talent.
  • School Supplies: Teachers are always in need of school supplies for the year ahead. Put together a gift basket full of supplies to get the teacher ahead in the year to come.
  • Gift Certificates: Gift certificates are a great way to show your appreciation when you don’t know the person on a personal level. Restaurant, bookstore and movie certificates will allow the user to purchase what they like most, or simply enjoy a night out over the holiday.
  • Say it with Words: Sometimes the best gift is the most simple words. A card or hand written note thanking the teacher for educating your child can touch a soul and say more than a gift. If you are tight on cash, but want to show you care pick up a card at your local dollar store, or create a hand-written letter telling them you appreciate their work. Teachers don’t ‘expect’ gifts, so any thought at all is going to be appreciated.

Your child’s teacher has worked hard to provide the best education they can throughout the year. Whether you decide to give a gift, or opt not to, a simple Thank-you is always a great way to show you care.

Do you send gifts to the teacher? If so, What kind of gifts do you give?

And You Thought ‘YOU’ Were a Bad Parent….


I had started out writing a list of Tips for a Successful Summer vacation with the kids when I stumbled across the following question posted on a website and I HAD to share it here. This is for all the parents who feel like they are not doing their best at times, all the mothers who question if they are ‘bad’ parents, and all the times that parents have wanted to, or actually did, lose their cool… You are ‘Parent of the Year‘ compared to this:

My wife and I adopted a child in a foreign country over 8 yrs ago. We have been experiencing a lot of problems with this child from her telling us she hates us, her cursing at us, bad behavior at school and at home. Can we give up our parental rights to her even if she is not a legal resident of the U.S.? My wife has serious health problems and I am currently having several emotional problems due to the problems caused by our child.

WTF??? Is this guy serious???

This is not a stray cat, or pet goldfish we are talking about!!!
This is a child!

A child that these people made a conscious choice to bring into their lives, probably after much Consideration. Never mind the fact that international adoption is a difficult procedure that usually requires various complex procedures, interviews, complicated paperwork and a whole lot of cash!!! You don’t just give a child away after “over 8 years” because they are acting out… This couple puts any other ‘bad mother’ (a.k.a Britney Spears, Kate plus 8, and Octa-mom) to shame!

The worst part of this is the fact that; not only was responding closed on this question, meaning I was unable to tell this couple exactly how low and pathetic I thought they were, but the responses that followed were people who were understanding and sympathetic…. WTF is WRONG with ppl???

If I announced the equivalent of this on my Facebook in regards to my child I am almost sure that not only would I have NO friends or contacts left, Child Services would most surely be knocking down my door with hours of my post!

I was horrified when I read this absolutely disgusting question, but I was even more horrified to discover that the issue they are inquiring about happens “all the time”. I learned through some simple research that many children who have been adopted from foreign countries get sent back days, weeks, and even years later!

I heard about one couple that actually put their adopted daughter on a plane back to Russia with a note attached to her jacket. The note simply read: “Here, we don’t want her anymore!”

Something is seriously wrong with people…. This is not Walmart, there is no refund and even Walmart wouldn’t do an exchange after 8 years!!!

I get upset enough when I see ads offering ‘beloved family dog needs a new home. Rufus is 14 years old (or 5, or 9)…’ it’s not right to give away a pet that has been part of your life that long, let alone a child with feelings and emotions.

What did these people think when they made the choice to adopt? Did they think that because the child was from a less prosperous country that she/he would hang on their every word and treat them like Gods??? This child has no idea that they were rescued from bad place, that they were given a chance at a better future. They have no idea that their parents are supposed to be their hero’s. Even if they did know all that, they are children. Children are jerks, they are rude, and bad and they get into trouble. Just like getting a puppy… you have to expect that it is going to piss on your floor a few times at least!

My son rolls his eyes at me, he talks back sometimes, and he just generally pisses me off, that doesn’t mean I am going to ship him back up the old birth canal, or package him up and send him back to the manufacturer… This is not some electronic you got at Best Buy that comes with a lifetime warranty… this is a human being with feelings, thoughts and life….

I don’t know what this couple decided to do. Honestly I hope they did find a way to ‘Get Rid of’ the child (as the post was so compassionately titled) because they don’t deserve to be parents, they don’t deserve much in my books… Sure our kids drive us crazy, and once in a while we all consider sending them off to Timbuktu, but children bring joy, love, honesty, and compassion to our lives. They teach us lessons we would never otherwise learn. They show us the beauty and gift of life, a gift this couple should never have received in the first place!!

Honestly I have NEVER been more disappointed in a parent before, and if this couple ever happens to stumble across this post I hope they read it and feel like the pieces of s**t that they are.

***END RANT***

Technologically Speaking


MSI laptop computer

Image via Wikipedia

I need to be honest, I never ‘actually’ realized how much my life revolves around my computer until recently. Yes, I am aware that I spend a large amount of time online doing “one thing or another” but I what I was not aware of was how much I rely on the internet for entertainment. My computer was out of commission last week and I have to say I was a bit more ‘lost’ than I expected to be. A large amount of my day is spent online, reading, writing, or simply socializing with other. As well as learning many new and interesting things. I expected some withdrawal, of course, but I can honestly say that ‘some‘ withdrawal quickly became an understatement… at least at first anyway. Life (a week and a half)without my computer was hard, but it taught me a few things; things about myself, my life, and the world we live in….

What I didn’t learn online:

  • I am a basket-case without an internet connection – The first few days without a computer were a complete and utter shock to my system. I sat at the desk where my computer had been and simply stared at the empty space that had once held my beloved laptop. I was lost, I admit it, sad as it sounds I truly did not know what to do with myself while not online. Much time was spent simply staring into thin air with the slight hope that somehow, someway, this was all a bad dream. There may even have been a few tears shed…
  • It is very difficult for me to function without Google – I never realized how much I rely on Google to handle my day-to-day issues. There were questions my children asked that I couldn’t answer, phone numbers and addresses that I was unable to find. Dinners that bordered on ‘prison food’ standards from lack of recipes, medical issues and strange symptoms that could not be diagnosed, and a number of other tasks that never got done all because I am a Google whore! Yes, I said it… Loud and proud… I Google EVERYTHING!!
  • I can almost guarantee that I suffer from adult ADHD – I love reading. In fact, most of my time online is spent reading one site or another on various topics of interest, but how often I actually finish reading a site is a question I fear I should not answer… The beauty of the internet is that information is created for fast consumption. I can easily get the point without having to go very in-depth, reading a book on the other hand requires attention that I seem to have lost at some point in the recent past!
  • My kids are quite annoying – When I have nothing to distract me, my children are actually quite annoying to deal with… This ‘in your face, look at me non-sense’ that seems to have started the minute my laptop left the house, was all a bit much for me to be honest with you… and though our ‘family time’ was fun, it was truly exhausting.
  • My house is a mess – Once my eyes adjusted and were able to take in what was around them, (instead of being set to see through the glare of the screen) I realized that my house is a ‘pigsty’ I will say that in the days that the computer I got far more housework accomplished… I wonder if there is a connection!
  • It is really nice outside – Once you get up and get out in the sun, it is actually quite pleasant… Some would even say “Summer-like” but that would be impossible… I mean time couldn’t really pass me by like that now could it???
  • My family is actually amusing – Once I recovered from the initial shock I suppose I actually started to enjoy the disconnection from the world. I spent time with my family, enjoyed the outdoors, read a book (well parts of a book anyway) and even picked up a pen to write.. I can not even remember the last time I wrote with a pen! I learned that my family is actually somewhat amusing at times, and even a bit fun!
  • Boredom makes me miserable – Despite the fact that I got over the computer being gone, despite the fact that I even embraced it being gone by the end, I still learned that when I get bored I become a ‘bitch’. I require constant amusement and no one can provide that like my trusty little laptop…. People have their own emotional needs that just don’t work in my favor!
I must say, though I didn’t like not having a computer, I did appreciate the extra time I had when not online. I used the phone instead of Facebook and actually heard friends voices for the first time in a while. I got a lot done…. And you know, once my computer was back I didn’t even miss it all that much! Now that it is here and I am sitting on it I decided that I would make myself a pact… Though I love my computer and there is soooo.. much on the net that I want to see and read, I also want to enjoy my life, my family and myself… Thus I will not sacrifice time in real-life, for time online!
Take time each day to enjoy the world you live in, learn to appreciate the simple things in life. All that is online will be there later, those that are in your life may not….
– K8 
Cheers!

An Irresistibly Sweet Start to a Sunny Sunday…


My Sunday started off on a very positive note. I received an email from a fellow blogger informing me that she had something for me on her site. Curious I wandered over to GhostWriter a great WordPress site at https://1wordywoman.wordpress.com and saw that I had been given an award for my blog!!!

I was overjoyed! What an amazing honor, and a great way to close the weekend. Thanks Marantha I really appreciate this more than you know. This award is called “The Irresistibly Sweet Blog Award” and it couldn’t have come at a better time. I have been lacking inspiration lately and was even considering shutting down my Random Musings site to move on to new adventures…. This award made me change my mind. Every writer enjoy’s knowing that people actually read their blogs or writings. I am no different. I needed this reminder, especially today, as motivation to keep writing. I love seeing that people are enjoying my posts and that what I write is affecting them in some way. So once again I must say Thanks you from the bottom of my heart.

As with all awards there are rules involved with my acceptance. First I must link back to the person that sent it to me, and so if you have not had a chance to check out GhostWriter here on WordPress you must do so right now. Marantha is an amazing writer who is inspiring and open hearted. She has a way with words and is just a kind-hearted soul. Go check out her blog and get inspired by her writing.

The next thing I am supposed to do in acceptance of this award is list seven things about myself… So here it goes:

  • I don’t feel like the ‘grown-up’ that I am supposed to be. I think perhaps I am a teenager stuck inside a grown-up’s body!
  • I never wanted children and now I have two… and though I wouldn’t change that for the world, I often worry that I am a terrible mother.
  • I love writing. It is my way of dealing with my emotions and releasing the stress of the day.
  • When I was younger I wanted to be a singer… I can’t carry a tune now to save my life as I have smoked for several years.
  • I currently post to 3 different blogs. One of which is more ‘private’ in nature and was created to help me find Who I am inside..
  • I am an overly creative person and I often allow my imagination to get the best of me.
  • I currently have no idea what I want to do with my life….

And lastly I am supposed to pass this award on to 15 writers that I believe are deserving of such notice… Below is my list:

http://thypolarlife.wordpress.com/
Always entertaining, often funny, and a very kind-hearted person. Check out her blog it is a great read.

http://experification.wordpress.com/
An amazing writer with an open mind and a way with words. Another great site to check out.

http://letmestartbysaying.wordpress.com
Fun, Funny, and great to follow. A little something for everyone here.

http://loveaddictnyc.com/
Follow a love addicted journey through NYC.

http://aayoung.wordpress.com/
Poetry from the heart.

http://motherhensnest.wordpress.com/
Always a good time, and ample amounts of wisdom.

http://bigsheepcommunications.wordpress.com/
Interesting and entertaining.

http://todayithink.wordpress.com/
Honesty and openness a refreshing read that is ever evolving.

http://whyamihereinahandbasket.com/
Wildly entertaining.

http://motherhoodwtf.com/
Guaranteed to make you giggle.

http://toohotmamas.wordpress.com/
Yet another great site you must check out.

http://sloopie72.wordpress.com/
Worth checking out.

http://inosculation.wordpress.com/
Great writing about simple things.

http://thehindsightletters.com/
Interesting and inspirational.

http://torinelson.wordpress.com/
Hours of entertainment.

And there you have it, all of those listed above are amazing and talented writers that help to inspire and entertain me each day. If you have not had a chance to view these sites I highly suggest that you do so. Take some time to kick back, relax and enjoy a good read… you are guaranteed to get one with these blogs.

To everyone else that I failed to list, I appreciate your writing as well. There are far too many talented writers both on WordPress and other sites, to list that constantly create amazing posts and regularly make me smile.

Once again a great big Thanks to Marantha over at GhostWriter for bestowing this award upon me today. You truly are an amazing woman and I appreciate your kind words and your amazing writing.

Cheers!