People Never Cease To Amaze Me!!


Its been an awfully long time since I have written anything on this site and it kind of makes me sad. Life has, as always, been hectic but even more so now that I am a full-time college student and single mother of two. Still, this site has been my outlet for so long that I don’t want to just forget about it and have it fade away… So I am here now, and I am going to try to be here somewhat regularly to post and vent and share all of my crazy thoughts and ideas. Which is probably a good idea since bottling them up makes me crazy and saying them out loud in public can sometimes get me into trouble…

So on to the thoughts I am having this moment that brought me here in the first place…

I haven’t been sleeping well lately.. Okay let’s be honest, I have not slept well since my daughter was born 4 years ago but lately it has been really bad. I wake up several times a night and for a while when it first started happening I would lay there trying to force myself back to sleep but all that did was make me frustrated and spin the psychotic scenario wheels inside my head. So, lately I have taken to getting up out of bed and actually doing things until I feel tired again… Some nights it works and I am back in bed in a couple of hours, other nights I am up for the day from 3 am on… Those days are super fun, let me tell you.. and they create this nap, awake late, can’t sleep, nap cycle that is even worse than not being able to sleep in the first place…

Anyway.. Not sleeping is not the topic I am aiming to talk about here so let me get back on track.

While I am awake in the wee hours of the morning/night I tend to browse Facebook and other online sites for funny, stupid, entertaining and overall interesting information. Sometimes it melts my brain into mush, sometimes I learn something amazing and sometimes I am touched by the kindness of humanity… but other times I am appalled..

Today was one of those days. 

I came across a post on Facebook and it was a picture that a mother has posted of her son it had caption that stated his name and age (I think he was 3 or 4) and went on to explain that he likes to wear dresses and play with dolls and that she was perfectly okay with that. She said she wanted her son to know that he could be whatever he wanted and basically that she didn’t want the superficial constraints of society to determine his gender norms. She simply wanted her son to be happy and to do what made him happy…

This is NOT what appalled me… 

What appalled me was the pathetic response from the public about how she should be raising her child, how what she is doing is abusive, how she is going to “turn him gay” and how he is doomed to be bullied…

Seriously???

I have the utmost respect for this woman and any parent that can embrace their child’s choices so openly. I am sure it is not an easy task to watch your son walk around in a floral sundress but accepting that it is his choice, his right if you will, is an amazing act of parenting if you ask me.

This mother is not going to “turn her son gay”, I guess the person that posted this comment missed the memo but BEING GAY IS NOT A CHOICE!

Nor is she is not setting him up or dooming him to a life of being bullied.. EVEN IF he is still wearing dresses when he goes to school this doesn’t mean he is going to be teased anymore than anyone else..

And besides, maybe the person that commented this should consider Support Transgendertalking to their kids about gender variance and bullying so that hopefully ‘the boy in the dress’ won’t be bullied…

Kids can be mean but they are bullies because they are not taught to accept differences, or they are lacking attention, or because of some other outside factor.. Kids are not naturally bullies; we are not born with the mindset to discriminate, it is created over time in various ways. In fact, much of the time it is the parents attitudes and opinions coming out of the children’s  mouths…

There were of course the expected comments about God Hating Gays and the Bible verses to go with them. I am not religious so I can not hurl verses back that I am sure exist saying “do not judge”, or “love is love in any form” or something of that nature.. But what I can say is that the Bible is pretty damn old and the world has changed a great deal since these “rules” were created.. Don’t you think that God, who apparently created the world, would probably adapt his rules and opinions to fit the ever-changing ways of humanity??? Or in the very least strike every gay person down with a bolt of lightning if he truly did hate them so much!!!

Just sayin’.

My point here, other than ranting and raving, is that every once in a while I come across a post or comments that truly make me sad. People live inside little boxes and refuse to consider anything that doesn’t fit perfectly inside. When we live like this the only person we are harming is ourselves and the only ones that suffer are the future generations who have been taught that everything has to fit perfectly inside their little box.

Until Next Time…

Be Yourself; Explore Yourself.
Ps. There is a great post on gender variance in MacLean’s Magazine for anyone that is interested in the topic. You can access it HERE

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The Life and Death of June Cleaver


Being an ideal parent requires a level of energy not found at the bottom of a pot of coffee, or a case of red bull. No matter your daily caffeine consumption, or your history as a high-school cheerleader, chances are you’re running low on steam at some point throughout the day.. Lately, For me, that ‘point’ is one that is constant.

I never seem to have enough oomph in me to ‘get things done’. Hell, let’s be honest… I am lucky if I manage to get them started these days. I am not gonna lie. I am God Damn EXHAUSTED and that “mother of the year” award is well out of my reach.

I am no June Cleaver, that’s for sure, but is that really such a bad thing?

I look around at all the parents I know, and while there are a few that might ‘pretend’ to be perfect on Facebook, it is a rare sight to see one that actually is. The truth is, most of my Mommy friends don’t even try to pretend they have it all together anymore, and you know what… they are a lot happier because of it.

I had the inkling to Google ‘June Cleaver” syndrome, (this curiosity came to me while I probably should have been cleaning my kitchen)  and what I found was hilarious… I really was just joking around, but apparently I am not the only one that see this as an issue in life.  Here is what came up in my search…

The first result from Google was a site called Ungrind.com and the author has a post called ‘June Cleaver Syndrome” in which she writes this:

June Cleaver Syndrome develops when we’re busy imitating someone else’s expectations, rather than those that are a reasonable fit for our lifestyle. We have an idea of what a “perfect” mom should look like, but that image isn’t anything near to the woman we are.

I can not help but envy the woman who wrote this, and agree 100% with the words. Even in the world we live in today, where the shows we watch make being a less-than-perfect mother a little more common (and dare I say acceptable) but we are also faced with the other extreme and judgment that comes along with this reality should it fall too far out of reach.

Sure, nobody expects us to stay home and cook and clean all day, a mother’s sole purpose in life is not to raise the children and keep the house… Yet how much of those duties have really been passed on?? Yes, we go out and work, or we can get away with a less than spotless house, but how do we ‘feel’ about it? How do we think we look because of it? How many of us worry, or make excuses for it? How many feel ‘bad’? Well I say, GET OVER IT!!

I am far too exhausted to worry about whether there is dust on my shelves, whether my floors are a little too sticky, or there are dishes in my sink. I am not going to vacuum every single day, and I am fine with the fact that there are fingerprints on my windows…

I am done with trying to be a ‘great’ mom, trying to please everyone, or trying to impress guests.. The truth is, I’M TRIED, and if you don’t know how that feels as a mother then your obviously on drugs (in which case, I want to know what they are and where you got them) because the truth is that just like everyone else I’d love to have a spotless house, and spend quality time with my children whenever they desired, teaching them endlessly, cherishing each second and watching them blossom and grow… But I am just too damn tired to care, and I highly doubt that my mucky floors are going to ruin their childhood.

I do what I can, when I can, IF I want to.. and If you don’t understand that, then you may not want to come over for a cup of tea or that bottle of wine because I am not going to kill myself simply to impress other people!

NoJuneCleaver

This was just another random rant from a Mad Mama.

Until Next Time…

 

Drive-Thru Funeral Home Lets You Pay Your Respects on the Go | AutoGuide.com News


Of all the strange things the internet has opened my eyes to, this one surely takes the cake…. Is life SO busy that you NEED a ‘drive-thru’ funeral home??? Can you really not get out of your car to say Good-bye to a loved one??? Is a sad world that we live in these days… People don’t talk to each other anymore they text, and NOW you can’t even have a proper funeral where people spend time together reflecting on your life!! Tell me WHY is the world going mad???

Below is the article about the Drive-Thru Funeral home that disgusts me SO much….

via Drive-Thru Funeral Home Lets You Pay Your Respects on the Go | AutoGuide.com News.

Fame Claims Another Life – Amy Winehouse and the celebrity influence


If you follow the celebrity world, and even if you don’t, you are probably aware that singer Amy Winehouse was found dead in her London apartment July 23, after suffering a drug overdose. She was 27 years old.

Is this the role model you want for your daughter?

Amy Winehouse, born September 14, 1983, was most known for her song titled ‘Rehab‘ in which the young woman sings “They tried to make me go to rehab I said No, no, no.” Winehouse has battled an addiction publicly since she first entered the world of fame, and even had to cancel her European tour recently after a performance where she could only be described as “out of it.

Since her death headlines and status updates have declared “shock” and “bewilderment”. There has been an overwhelming amount of sadness and sympathy, fans, friends and other celebrities are remembering fondly the singers beautiful voice, but they are forgetting the facts…

Now I warn you in advance, this IS going to offend someone…

The truth is, there is NO shock. If you are shocked that a 27-year-old, heroin addict with more money than God died of an overdose you are living in a bubble and I am about to burst it.

This woman was not ‘fabulous, wonderful, or amazing’ as I have seen written on walls, statuses and pages all over the internet. She was a very messed up young girl that needed HELP not a record contract!!!

YES, it is sad that she died. Of course it is sad. I am a bitch, but I am not heartless, no one should have to suffer that way, but I don’t have sympathy because with all resources available in this world today, and especially with all the money she had, she could have gotten help for her addiction.

I’ll tell you what IS shocking….

It is shocking that every single day we as parents sit here and tell our children that drugs are bad. We tell them that drugs will get them nowhere in life, that drugs will kill them, that drugs will rip their future from them. We repeat constantly that if they do drugs they are doomed to be losers for life….

Yet, EVERYDAY our children are picking up magazines, watching television shows and listening to music that is promoting, creating and supporting celebrities on drugs...

Lindsay Lohan, Nicole Richie, and Paris Hilton are just the obvious examples. There are an ample number of celebrities that have been caught, or accused, of using drugs in the eyes of the media, and the eyes of our impressionable children.

The point is, These celebrities are supposed to be role models to our children. Young girls were watching Amy Winehouse, thinking she was cool, listening to her music, and aspiring to be like her…

Would you want your daughter looking up to a heroin addict?

Our children are looking up to all of these celebrities, turning to them for guidance, living life dreaming of being ‘just like them‘ one day, and they are not presenting a very good image for our children to mirror.

Cocaine, Heroin, DUI‘s and Hookers are the norm in the celebrity world today. Domestic violence, rehab and repeat offences have become our headline news. There is rarely consequence to the actions, unless it is the fate that Amy Winehouse has now suffered. Rarely do courts do more than give these celebrities a light slap on the wrist, allowing them to step out of court unscathed and teaching the teens that closely watch them that being famous means doing whatever you please without consequences.

Sure, you can argue that drugs have always been a part of Hollywood, but have they always been a part of your neighborhood to the extent that they are today? Children can get their hands on Cocaine easier than they can a basketball or jump-rope now a days, and Hollywood isn’t helping matters at all.

Amy Winehouse should be an example. Producers should consider more than the fact that someone has a good voice. A good voice is a dime a dozen, just look at American Idol. If an artist is going to be signed to a label, put in a film or shown on television they should not be high on drugs.

I can’t point blame at the producers, though I am sure the dollar signs may have blurred their insights, it is the artists and celebrities themselves that are to blame as well. You enter the world of fame knowing the costs associated with it, the lack of privacy and the pressure that come along with celebrity status. You make the choice to give up normality, you have no one but yourself to blame if you can’t handle the heat. You are a ‘role model‘ and whether you like it or not there are young people out there who are looking up to you. There are pre-teen kids who want to be like you, who watch you and mimic you. Celebrities: pull yourselves together and show them what they can be besides a heroin addicted whore.

Perhaps I am being harsh, but it truly makes me sick because there are thousands of aspiring artists, actors and singers out there that would gladly trade places with these spoiled little brats and never consider shoving a line up their nose or a needle in their arms. If fame makes you so miserable than stop working, singing, or acting and go home, go hide, or just go away. Ten other people ‘just like you’ will gladly take your place, and easily fill your shoes.

I am so sick of seeing headlines about celebrity arrests, drug overdoses and DUI’s. It is time that celebrities step up and show our kids what ‘hard work‘ and ‘dreams’ really are. It is time that they start standing up AGAINST drug use rather than promoting it. It is time they accept that they are role models to young boys and girls, and time they consider the consequences of their actions.

No offence to Amy Winehouse, of course she had talent, and clearly suffered from the disease that is addiction. She was a heroin addict that should have never had the opportunity to influence our children and when they tried to make her go to rehab she shouldn’t have said ‘No, no, no…

And You Thought ‘YOU’ Were a Bad Parent….


I had started out writing a list of Tips for a Successful Summer vacation with the kids when I stumbled across the following question posted on a website and I HAD to share it here. This is for all the parents who feel like they are not doing their best at times, all the mothers who question if they are ‘bad’ parents, and all the times that parents have wanted to, or actually did, lose their cool… You are ‘Parent of the Year‘ compared to this:

My wife and I adopted a child in a foreign country over 8 yrs ago. We have been experiencing a lot of problems with this child from her telling us she hates us, her cursing at us, bad behavior at school and at home. Can we give up our parental rights to her even if she is not a legal resident of the U.S.? My wife has serious health problems and I am currently having several emotional problems due to the problems caused by our child.

WTF??? Is this guy serious???

This is not a stray cat, or pet goldfish we are talking about!!!
This is a child!

A child that these people made a conscious choice to bring into their lives, probably after much Consideration. Never mind the fact that international adoption is a difficult procedure that usually requires various complex procedures, interviews, complicated paperwork and a whole lot of cash!!! You don’t just give a child away after “over 8 years” because they are acting out… This couple puts any other ‘bad mother’ (a.k.a Britney Spears, Kate plus 8, and Octa-mom) to shame!

The worst part of this is the fact that; not only was responding closed on this question, meaning I was unable to tell this couple exactly how low and pathetic I thought they were, but the responses that followed were people who were understanding and sympathetic…. WTF is WRONG with ppl???

If I announced the equivalent of this on my Facebook in regards to my child I am almost sure that not only would I have NO friends or contacts left, Child Services would most surely be knocking down my door with hours of my post!

I was horrified when I read this absolutely disgusting question, but I was even more horrified to discover that the issue they are inquiring about happens “all the time”. I learned through some simple research that many children who have been adopted from foreign countries get sent back days, weeks, and even years later!

I heard about one couple that actually put their adopted daughter on a plane back to Russia with a note attached to her jacket. The note simply read: “Here, we don’t want her anymore!”

Something is seriously wrong with people…. This is not Walmart, there is no refund and even Walmart wouldn’t do an exchange after 8 years!!!

I get upset enough when I see ads offering ‘beloved family dog needs a new home. Rufus is 14 years old (or 5, or 9)…’ it’s not right to give away a pet that has been part of your life that long, let alone a child with feelings and emotions.

What did these people think when they made the choice to adopt? Did they think that because the child was from a less prosperous country that she/he would hang on their every word and treat them like Gods??? This child has no idea that they were rescued from bad place, that they were given a chance at a better future. They have no idea that their parents are supposed to be their hero’s. Even if they did know all that, they are children. Children are jerks, they are rude, and bad and they get into trouble. Just like getting a puppy… you have to expect that it is going to piss on your floor a few times at least!

My son rolls his eyes at me, he talks back sometimes, and he just generally pisses me off, that doesn’t mean I am going to ship him back up the old birth canal, or package him up and send him back to the manufacturer… This is not some electronic you got at Best Buy that comes with a lifetime warranty… this is a human being with feelings, thoughts and life….

I don’t know what this couple decided to do. Honestly I hope they did find a way to ‘Get Rid of’ the child (as the post was so compassionately titled) because they don’t deserve to be parents, they don’t deserve much in my books… Sure our kids drive us crazy, and once in a while we all consider sending them off to Timbuktu, but children bring joy, love, honesty, and compassion to our lives. They teach us lessons we would never otherwise learn. They show us the beauty and gift of life, a gift this couple should never have received in the first place!!

Honestly I have NEVER been more disappointed in a parent before, and if this couple ever happens to stumble across this post I hope they read it and feel like the pieces of s**t that they are.

***END RANT***

The Argument Against Child Pageants… In My Opinion a Form of Abuse!


Low self-esteem is a serious issue in young girls, and a topic that I have addressed many times on my blogs, and in life. The effects of low self-esteem run deeper than most people imagine, and can cause irreparable harm to a woman’s emotional well-being years down the road. Beauty Pageants are a competition of ‘beauty‘, a judgment of looks and image that in essence decides who is beautiful and who is not. These competitions are a major cause of low self-esteem in girls today, and need to be addressed on a very serious level.

Is this what beauty means to you???

The popularity of beauty pageants has grown by leaps and bounds over the last decade. Long gone are the days of the teenage “Georgia Peach” pageants, replaced with ‘Little Miss Perfect” and “Toddlers in Tiaras.” The fight for beauty has seeped into our young children and is creating countless issues that will be prominent in these children in the years to come.

Girls as young as 4 and 5 years-old are being ‘forced‘ to succumb to spray tans and hair bleaching in the name of beauty. They are being made to look like skanky young adults, and are being robbed of their childhood in the whole sickening process. I used the word “Forced” because I don’t believe that any 4 or 5 year-old child would choose to go through what these young pageant girls must go through each and every day. Though many of them probably view the whole charade as “Fun” I believe that it is more due to the fact that they are being told it’s fun, then the actual enjoyment of the situation.

Now, I have no issue with pageants themselves. Beauty Pageants can be great for building confidence and self-esteem. Young girls having a chance to show-off their talents and intelligence is a wonderful thing. What I have an issue with is what these pageants have become over time… No longer is a beauty pageant about being cute, being talented, or being intelligent. These pageants are about bleach blonde unnatural hair, fake tans, false teeth and a Barbie doll image that doesn’t exist. I ask these parents of pageant girls,

What are you teaching your children?

The image you are creating for your daughter is unattainable, and because of this falsity it is bound to have disastrous results. You can tell a little girl wining doesn’t matter until your blue in the face, but through turning her into something she is not you are speaking volumes in the opposite direction… and that is exactly what you are doing while you are spray tanning you child and bleaching her hair… you are telling her that the way she is, is not good enough… No matter what you try to say otherwise… that is the message you are sending, consciously or not!

I have been asked numerous times if I think these pageants should be banned, and my answer is always “Yes“. I think they have to be banned, for the time being at least. I don’t think that these parents have a clue the damage they are doing to their children and without the outside world stepping in to stop it, I don’t think they ever will. These mothers of pageant girls easily defend their actions no matter how much factual information they are faced with to show them the damage they are creating. Parents will defend their children by listing the benefits that pageants provide, benefits such as; Confidence, self-esteem, poise, and drive for success. But they fail to consider the consequences that surround the teaching of such false values and shallow views. Pageants now a days don’t teach girls about confidence, they teach girls that having a “Barbie Doll” image is the way of the world. They don’t teach self-esteem, they teach girls that who they are is not good enough for success, that beauty is skin deep and that without it they are nothing. They don’t teach poise, they teach children that being fake is society’s preference, and being who you are inside is going to get you no where. Is this the lesson we want our children to have??? Is this the reality we truly want them to live in?

I could rant and rave for hours on the effects of pageants, but as I said it is not the actual pageant itself, it is what these competitions have become….

My daughter is beautiful. She has light brown hair, a gap between her teeth and often a filthy face. She toddles around the house getting into trouble and making a great big mess. To me she is perfect just the way she is… I would never consider bleaching her hair, or spraying on a tan just to gain a trophy to place in her room.

Should my daughter ever suffer from low self-esteem I will reassure her of her beauty by placing her in front of a mirror and pointing out her good traits. I will remind her of how smart she is, and the talents she has, and the health she should be thankful for. I will help her feel secure by acknowledging that everyone looks and acts differently, and I  will be sure she knows that images in magazines are airbrushed fakes.

How can you deny your daughter the joy of who she truly is inside? That is the part of her that makes her unique.

Perhaps these parents are living vicariously through their children. I believe that each has security issues of their own that they are trying to appease by turning their children into their image of perfection… They need to open their eyes and realize that their children are wonderful just the way they are, and that they can not take back years of their own insecurity by creating a “Barbie Doll” that is not real!

Teaching your daughter that being beautiful is a sure road to fame and success is only enhancing the issues we have in the world today. It is true society values beauty, but shouldn’t we as parents be trying to change that view? We certainly shouldn’t be encouraging it, as this is only worsening the issue at hand.

Look now at your children, look deep into their eyes, Can you honestly tell me that they are not amazing JUST THE WAY THEY ARE?

So yes, I say ban the pageants. Stop this ‘abuse‘. Children should be taught to love themselves as they are, not forced to live a false image that does not exist. Teach your daughters to respect themselves, accept themselves and most importantly be themselves… or this issue is going to repeat itself as it has in you!

Here is a great link about the effects these pageants can have on our young girls, please check it out:  http://www.momlogic.com/2009/04/child_beauty_pageants.php

 

Cheers!

 

 

 

 

 

 

Newsflash: Cheerleader Denied Justice (Again)


Newsflash: Cheerleader Denied Justice (Again) : Ms Magazine Blog – StumbleUpon.

The link listed above is something that I HAD to share… Read the story and imagine yourself in this poor girls shoes…

Then share it with everyone you know….

A brief overview for you; This is the story of Hillaire S, a 16 year-old high school student who was taken into a dark room at a party and raped by the school’s star basketball player while one of his friends pinned her down. Thankfully her cries for him to “stop” were heard by some other students in the hallway of the home, who broke in the door and scared the attacker away.

The boy, Rakheem Bolton, was charged with rape, as was his accomplice, but three months after the offense a grand jury chose NOT to indite either of the students on the alleged charges. An investigation showed that one of the jury members was the offender’s pastor, and his cousin happened to  powerful member of city council, under the employment of the District Attorney!

Though he was eventually forced to face court again on an appeal, he ended up pleading to a lesser charge of simple assault. Adding insult to injury this boy was allowed to return to the school campus between court appearances, and was even allowed to play during the schools basket ball play-offs. The victim, who was a member of the school’s cheer-leading squad, refused to cheer for her rapist during one of the teams games. The cheer she refused to chant???  “Two, Four, Six, Eight, Ten.. Come on Rakheem, Put It In!”

For refusing to cheer for attacker she was kicked off the cheer-leading squad by the schools Superintendent and other school administrators.

Her parents, outraged by the schools actions and lack of concern for their daughter’s safety and well-being in the first place, let alone in this specific situation, decided to sue the school for ‘violating her right to freedom of speech

Unfortunately the court did not side with the family and the case was dismissed, an appeal ended with a refusal to hear the case, and the families fight has fallen silent.

I was shocked by this story. I suppose that I shouldn’t be surprised, everyday you find stories just like this one, that tell of a justice system failing those victims that turn to them for help, but it never fails to disgust me…. no matter how many times I read about it.

I think Naomi said it best with her comment on the original post, “This IS absolutely infuriating… but not surprising” and THAT is sad! Almost daily young men are getting away with unlawful and immoral acts all over America, because they are “star player” or have family members that are in positions of power, and it is not just teens that get this kind of unfair, unjust treatment… How many celebrities have we seen who have broken the law, and not suffered the consequences?? Money and Fame afford you freedom… That is the message this country sends!

In this case I believe that Awareness is the key to combating Rape, the more of a fuss we make as citizens, the more the government will HAVE to do to deal with the problem. NO ONE should EVER get away with touching or harming anyone, no matter who they, their family, or friends are!! I don’t care if this kids grandfather is the Pope, or if he were the Pope himself…. He should suffer the consequences for making this young girl suffer the way she had to…

And as for the school… I can not even fathom what I would do if I was in her families position. This school should be ashamed of themselves… Are sports stars more important to you than the morals and laws of life? You really want to send the message that it is OK to rape? What are you telling these children? Children that we entrust to you daily, children that we as parents send to you in order to help us instill strong values? Children that we educate through you in the hopes that we can ultimately create adults with respect, intelligence and a drive for success, and THIS is the message you send them?  There is NO excuse for this schools actions.. some might argue that this boy is innocent until proven guilty, but isn’t that right the same for this young girl? Why does she not get the same respect or freedom?

THIS GIRL‘S SAFETY SHOULD HAVE BEEN PRIORITY

Not the star player or score of the game!

I can not even begin to express the outright disgust that I feel towards this school for the actions they have taken, as well as the courts for their lack there of. They have literally taken this girls open wounds and poured lemon juice on them… forcing her, I am sure, to relive this traumatic experience over and over…. Also shocking is the court’s dismissal of the families lawsuit brought about by their daughters refusal to cheer for her rapist.. Money would be the very least way, in my eyes, that the school could even begin to repair the damage they have done…. This young girl should never have been in the position in the first place where she would have HAD to make such a choice.. Her right to a safe school environment was outright ignored for the schools need to have a winning basketball team!

It shows a complete lack of respect, and a major internal issue… Did this girl not suffer enough? Why should she have to relive this trauma daily, in public, without any sign of a caring adult standing by to support her rights at school? How does this school make the decision that basketball is more important that the safety and well-being of a young girl?

I can not wrap my head around this no matter how hard I try.. no matter what angle I look at it from…

It is JUST WRONG!


My heart truly goes out to this girl and her family, if it was my daughter I am almost sure that would be on trial for murder.. I only hope they can read these words somehow and see that they are not alone, that they are supported in their efforts to find justice. I pray that they may get some peace knowing that no matter what, justice WILL some how prevail in the end.. because no matter what happens….

What goes around, comes around!

***I hope everyone that reads this story will somehow share it. Blog it, share it on Facebook and Tweet about it… Don’t let this poor girl suffer any more than she already has.. show her that you support her… that the “right” thing will be done some how, some way!!***

RAPE WILL NOT BE TOLERATED…

SEND THE MESSAGE…

TAKE A STAND!

Royally Entertained! Oh Yes, I’m gonna go there…


I admit it…..I am among the millions who rose early to watch the beauty and excitement that was The Royal Wedding. I am ‘one of those people‘ that sat in front of the television at 5 a.m. to see a little girls dream come true. I got teary eyed as I watched Kate Middleton step out of the car and walk down the aisle to meet her Prince and live her dream. (every little girls dream actually) I loved the dress, I love the service, I loved the speeches, and the entire affair. In fact, the sheer beauty of it, coupled with her stunning appearance made me decide that I should forgive the bitch for stealing my man and ruining my life…. It’s OK Kate… I see that you two are happy and in love, so…. I forgive you!

Besides I wouldn’t want to have to kiss in front of all those people anyway….(I’m not one for PDA)

What I did NOT like though is the fact that the media is a bunch of gossip hungry vultures that MUST find fault in everything, no matter how perfect the reality was….

Long after the Ceremony was over, and only minutes after their first kiss, I was bombarded on the internet with play-by-play analysis of how the first kiss was reluctant, hands-free and somewhat cold….. ARE YOU F**KING KIDDING ME????

The entire wedding was flawless, the bride beautiful, no one fainted, vomited, tripped in their high-heels, or shouted out that they were Prince Williams secret mistress and that they were having his bastard child…I would call that success! It was PERFECT! But that’s the media… they NEED to find something that they can pick apart… and when it isn’t there, they simply create it…

Reluctant, Hands-free, Abrupt, Cold, Disconnected…. HONESTLY???

I want to see them stand up there on a balcony in front of millions of people, let alone the billions of others you know are watching on television from the comfort of their homes, and be able to share a passionate kiss without the awkward discomfort that Kate and William must have been feeling.

I completely understand that this wedding was the biggest media event of the year, I also understand the pressure they must have felt to not only ensure that they were happy with the wedding, but to ensure that the media and the billions of viewers were happy as well… they sought perfection… and in my eyes they accomplished their goal.

I truly could not believe that there were headlines on Google claiming that the kiss looked forced, claiming it looked reluctant, and I even stumbled across one blogger who claimed they didn’t look as if they wanted to kiss! (I will not post the link to that blog here because I will not support someone who is clearly just looking for attention by taking an opposing position to EVERYONE else and probably does not actually believe his own ramblings to be true!)

I say Bull-roar I think that they were amazing.. Kate Middleton held herself together far better than any other bride in her position would. Yes, the girl was nervous, of course she was for crying out loud! I would have been passed out on the floor the minute I stepped out on that balcony and saw those millions of people standing there watching me. Actually, I probably would have abandoned my Prince at the alter knowing that my each and every move was going to be so closely scrutinized. I would have been hiding out in Mexico just to avoid the pressure, Prince or Peasant… That stress would have gotten the best of me. I can’t handle the normal stress of day-to-day life half the time, I would have created a media frenzy when I checked into a mental ward!!

It just disgusted me to see the media and people ripping this moment apart all for the slight chance that they might get even MORE attention, to possibly generate even MORE sales than they already were from one of the biggest “Happy” world events since Charles and Dianna… I think the media, and that blogger need to find better things to write about rather than pick apart perfection when there are no flaws to be found….

Now.. Since I forgive Kate Middleton, as I said before, for stealing my man and shattering my dreams.. I wish them all the best and I hope they have a long, happy, and prosperous marriage….

Besides….

Prince Harry is still available… and he became the better looking of the two anyway….

Until Next Time….

Write On! 

I Apologize in Advance, This Post IS Going to Offend Someone…


I apologize in advance, this post IS going to offend someone. I would like to say up front that it is not my intention to do so, I am simply exercising my right to freedom of speech, and venting my frustrations.

This is not a funny post, I don’t expect the laughter that I  usually look for when I write my blogs. This post is sobering, serious, and is probably going to piss a few people off. I simply want to make myself heard. I want to share my opinion, you can disagree with me, you can be angry with me, you can agree or you can argue, it’s your choice and you can share those feelings if you please. Freedom of speech is a part of this amazing country we live in…. We are separate people, we don’t have to feel the same, think the same, or want the same things. This is my opinion, I don’t expect you to like it. I don’t write to have people like me, and I don’t share my opinion in the hopes that it will make you want to be my friend. I learned long ago that you can not please everyone all the time and you shouldn’t even try…

My Motto; ‘Be who you are and say what you feel because those who mind don’t matter, and those who matter don’t mind.” I am who I am, love me or hate me, it’s not going to change me!

With that said I will state; this post is probably going to be considered, at least, PG 13 due to coarse language and mature subject matter.

Reader discretion is strongly advised! 

I am the furthest thing from racist. I don’t see color, never really have, I have friends from every corner of the earth. I believe that all people are equal, regardless of race, religion, or sexual orientation. I am a firm believer that everyone deserves an equal opportunity and a chance at a wonderful life….. What I don’t believe is that people should be allowed to come to our country and try to change the way we live. I don’t think it’s fair that I am not allowed to say Merry Christmas, and that schools no longer have Christmas Trees during the Holiday season. No one should tell me that I can’t sing the national anthem, or wear a cross if I desire to do so. My child should be able to celebrate the easter in school, and should be learning about Canadian history.

What I really disagree with is the fact that every single time I call any sort of government office I am greeted by an immigrant that came to Canada, is now working for the Canadian government, and can not speak, or understand, English, which is the main language of our beautiful country! Every time I have to deal with someone from the Canadian government on the phone it turns into a huge battle because the person on the other end of the line cannot understand what I am trying to say… In plain English!

Not to be rude, honestly I know how this must sound, but please read on and give me a chance to explain myself fully before you judge me as a rude, racist, self-centered bitch… (though rude, self-centered, and bitchy may be part of my personality, racist is not one of my traits)

My frustration is not directed at the fact that these people have chosen to immigrate to Canada in search of a better life. I have seen the way people in some of these countries they are fleeing from live, I have read and researched the suffering they have seen, and I can’t even begin to imagine some of the conditions they have survived, pain the have suffered, and the loss they have experienced. I have no issue at all with immigration, in fact, the more the merrier… I don’t even have a problem with these same immigrants securing jobs within our government sector and improving themselves, supporting their families, etc… I think that if you are coming over to this country you should be seeking a better life through employment and education, and you should be securing the best job possible to support you and your family. No, I have no problem with any of this…

What I DO have a problem with is that immigrants have come to Canada to better themselves, create a brighter future for their families and their children, and have become Canadian citizens by choice, and yet they still can not speak or understand fluent English, and they are answering the phones telling me what I have to do, and getting upset that I cannot understand them…

If you are going to come to another country and make the choice to become a citizen of that country, (that choice meaning you are leaving your life, your country and your suffering behind) you should be expected to live by that countries rules, and conform to that countries way of living.

  • Don’t come to Canada and tell us that we should change our flag.
  • Don’t demand that we will re-write our national anthem.
  • And don’t  expect us to speak your native language…

“You chose to come here because you felt it was a better life than you had in your country… if we immigrated to your country we would live by your rules.”

If you come to my house you are expected to remove your shoes at the front door, we do not smoke inside the house, and my children are in bed by 8 p.m….These are the rules of my house and visitors are expected to follow these simple rules. They maybe different from the rules in their house, but they chose to visit me..

I would not come into your home and refuse the rules you have laid out to live by.

  • I would not light a cigarette knowing that you do not smoke indoors.
  • I would not argue that your children should be allowed to stay up later.
  • And I would never dispute the routine that you chose to live by… it is your house.

I chose to visit you!

So why is it that these people chose to leave their country, (where their lives were obviously not fitting their needs) and come here to Canada, (or the U.S as they too face these issues) then try to turn this new country into their homeland?? No offence but If you liked the way things are were in your country, perhaps you should have stayed there!!!

Maybe I am being harsh, but I don’t think I am… I am not talking about religion. (which has nothing to do with the country you live in) I can understand not wanting to talk about the origin of ‘Christmas,’ being the birth of Christ, in schools. I understand the dispute of ‘The Lords Prayer‘ being recited each morning in public schools. (who are we to push the Catholic religion on someone forcing the assumption that it is the “right” religion) NO, that I understand!!! I am not arguing religious beliefs, I am arguing lack of respect, and the need for conformity. I am arguing that if you are going to choose to become a Canadian citizen, you must accept that, that choice means a new way of life.

  • It means a new language,
  • a new environment,
  • and a new set of rules to follow.

It means attempting to fit in to ‘their’ way of living, not expecting them to fit in to yours…. You chose to leave your country (probably for good reasons) I am not arguing that…but, if you are going to come here, you must accept that you made a choice to change your way of life overall, not just your address!

You can judge me if you want to, I really don’t care. I am not saying I don’t want immigrants in Canada, quite the opposite actually I love the diversity that immigration brings. I love the hope and the chance that it provides people who would otherwise have none.

I just feel that should you choose to come to Canada you should understand fully what it means to be Canadian.

  • You should speak and understand English fluently before you are given a job in a Canadian government office.
  • You should accept our flag as your flag now. Have respect and admiration for your history and your previous life, that’s perfectly acceptable, but don’t expect us to change our history or way of living to suit your needs. 
  • You should learn our national anthem in our language. OH! Canada was not written in Arabic, Hindi, Spanish, Italian, or Chinese.. It was written in English and in French… learn it in at least one of the two languages. 

Come to Canada, by all means, come! This is an amazing country with beautiful sights, wonderful people, endless opportunities, and an incredible way of life. We have amazing health care, a solid government (for the most part), a rich history, a strong pride, and great diversity… Yes, come, we welcome you! But as you sign your citizenship card, and swear your pledge to our flag, remember that you are making a choice to be Canadian. Remember that you do not  get to pick and choose what parts of our culture you can adapt to your new life, and remember that we are welcoming you into ‘our home’ with open arms. Make it easier on everyone and work hard to learn our language, live our ways, and be proudly Canadian…

Don’t be that person fighting on the phone because you can not understand what I am saying.
Don’t be that person fighting to change our anthem because it was not written with your language in mind.
Don’t be that person fighting to change our flag so it resembles your old countries just a little bit more. and,
Don’t be that person that spends their life living a lost dream.

Making the choice to be here is more than just a move, an environment, or an address.. It is a way of life that should be embraced whole heartedly.


The Rise of Size


The appearance of plus sized models has skyrocketed over the last few years. Long-gone are the days of Kate Moss and the heroin addict image that under-fed, bony models portrayed. Though the size of many models is still questionable, more and more magazines are opting to replace the skin-and-bones look with curvier, more realistic women in their spreads. 

Even Tyra Banks, one of the worlds former super-models, openly expressed her excitement at seeing heavier women in mainstream media. Banks, who has battled with her weight publicly for sometime, has stepped out of the ‘typical’ supermodel mold, and is boasting a beautiful, more curvaceous figure that she is proud to flaunt. Banks is the house of the hit television show ‘America’s Next Top Model‘, a show for which she fought successfully to allow heavier women the right to compete on.

This increase in plus size models is an amazing achievement for women everywhere. By employing women who are realistically proportioned the media is sending a strong message to the women of the world; the message that it is alright to be big. The message that you do not have to starve yourself to be beautiful, and the message that you are wonderful just the way you are.

Crystal Renn happens to be one of the most well know plus size models in the world, at 5ft 9in and 165lbs she doesn’t appear plus sized in person, but industry standards make it so. The specs of plus sized models are tight. Plus sized is considered to be any model over a size 10 (US) and generally 5’8 and up…

A ten may not seem so “plus size” to you, and it isn’t in the reality of things. Size 10 is among the average of women today, and this is even more reason for ‘plus size’ models to become the mainstream. Why should we promote a size 3 when the average woman is wearing a size 10? How is this promoting your product? How is this even realistic to everyday life for women of the world?

I personally say ‘Amen’ to the plus sized models of the world. Though not plus size myself, I have many friends who have battled with weight their entire lives. These are beautiful, sexy, intelligent woman who bear the right to be beautiful, not just within themselves but in the eyes of the world as well. I don’t see curves as a flaw but rather a feature, what is more beautiful than a woman with hips and a booty? How can we take a woman of average size and build and tell her she is too big to represent the women of the world? I hope that more magazines will step up and see that the true beauty of a woman is not in the size of her dress, but rather her natural beauty that shines from within.