Back to Sanity… I mean School!


Well there is less than a week until school starts and as usual I am not prepared at all… In fact, I am nowhere near ready. This years disorganization takes the cake in comparison to any other year before it. I am not known for my strong organization skills, and I am in fact known well as ‘procrastination queen’ (as well as drama queen, queen bitch, and spoiled princess)

This year I have somehow managed to completely and utterly out do myself and have managed to completely avoid any of the regular ‘back to school’ activities in the hopes that this ‘to-do list’ would somehow complete itself… Yet, it has not!

Now don’t get me wrong, I am über exited for school to begin again, I am a firm believer that summer vacation is far too long for kids. Even with only one of the two kids I own being in school, the return of classes brings much peace in to my home. No seriously, the contrast is astounding… and yet instead of being prepared and ready to ship my son off to grade three with a smiling face and a waiting bubble bath (for me) I have procrastinated yet again and left all of the major things until the last-minute. Now with less than a week until the start of classes panic is setting in and I have NOTHING!

My ‘Back-to-school To-Do List‘ is lengthy, and I can’t figure out where I am supposed to begin. I am positing it here in the hopes that one of my readers has a ‘back-to-school’ fairy I may be able to borrow for a day or two to tick some of these pesky tasks off this dreadful list….

Back-to-school To-Do

  1. Register C for new school
  2. Figure out where new school is so I can register C
  3. Figure out where new home is, so I can find out where new school is, so I can register C…
  4. Find new home…. (Yup this is procrastination at its finest)
  5. Purchase back-to-school items such as; Back pack, paper, pencils, binders, etc… (Honestly, Walmart should deliver!)
  6. Search out and purchase two, Yes! TWO, pairs of shoes for C (Shoe shopping with a boy is a pain in the ass in the first place, let alone show shopping for TWO pairs of shoes!!)
  7. Grocery shop for school lunch items that will not have Child Services at your door the first day back… (Note: Schools frown upon chocolate spread, cookies, candy and pop… Apparently lunch is supposed to be ‘healthy’ and promote good eating habits! This all stems back to some Sally Sue and her stupid organic garden I am sure!!!)
  8. Win the lottery… so I can find said house, purchase said items, go grocery shopping for these stupid ‘healthy organic items’ and find the new school so I can register C…
You know… On second thought, screw the fairy… I think I might need a whole team of them to tackle this list!!!

The To-Do Fairies... Helping battle lists since before lists existed!!

Why is it I don’t get a magical godmother? Honestly if anyone is deserving of a crazy lady with a wand its me, not these spoiled brats in cartoons that live in castles and whine about having to mop floors….

This is likely the Fairy God Mother I would end up with... it's just my luck!!

I know all this is my fault, I am a procrastinator and I am aware that it is an issue… But seriously people who have addiction problems get a break, people who have stealing problems get a break, My God even Tiger Woods (the sex addict) gets a break… Can’t I get a ‘Lazy Person’ Break????
Anyway… If you happen to have a team/army/or group of Fairies locked away in your closet/basement/dungeon, and you are not using them at the moment, PLEASE send them my way… I will PAY you for them… Tomorrow… Or maybe Next week….
Cheers!
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A Word on Comment Etiquette


I thought I would take a moment out of my day to write a quick post about proper comment etiquette. Now I am not going to claim to be an expert on the topic, I don’t claim to be an expert on any topic, but I do consider myself to have a high level of Customer Service skills and common sense. Combined with a strong opinion I feel that I am able enough to write this post….

Recently on one of my other blogs a reader commented on an error in my spelling which I appreciated openly. I was unable to fix the error at that moment, but have since revised so that it is correct. While checking my emails today and moderating my comments I came across a comment from another reader, pointing out an error in the original comment about my error… This was not an issue, what WAS an issue is that ‘this’ reader went on to be vulgar and foul in his/her comment and unnecessarily rude in general regarding both errors that were made. Thankfully I have my site set up to moderate comments before they are posted and I caught this before it hit the site, but it got me to thinking about the proper etiquette of commenting and the basic rules that people should follow.

The following are ‘MY’ personal guidelines, and are not meant to be ‘pushed’ on anyone. Feel free to add you own as well and share any tips, tricks or stories you might have in the comments section of this page.

 The Basics of Comment Etiquette:

  • First and foremost, keep it clean. When you are commenting on someone’s blog post, or on any site, it is important to remember that people of all ages may read the content on the site. Keep your comments free of foul language or sexual content unless you are sure the site is for a mature audience only.
  • Secondly, say to others only what you would appreciate hearing yourself. It is fine to point out an error, disagree with a view, or propose an opposition, but do so with tact. Swearing, belittling or general put-downs are not polite and I am sure you would not appreciate them on your site, why would you want to put them on someone else’s?
  • Commenting should enhance the post, share the love, or propose an opposite opinion. Disagreements, debates and even arguments are fine as long as they are done tastefully and neither side is trying to make the other look bad. It is important that you remember your comments are in black and white, like texting there is no emotion shown on the screen. Be careful with your choice of words as many times what you mean to say gets interpreted very differently than it should by incorrect word choice. Avoid aggressive words and remember to use “I” to show the readers that you are simply sharing your opinion.
  • Use comments as a line of communication. Comments on a post make the writer proud and often time comments encourage more writing. Use commenting to show your support for the site and to help bring traffic to your own. Posting a comment saying that you enjoyed the post is wonderful and it encourages the writer to not only reply to your comment, but to write more content as well. Positive feed back is motivating.
  • Remember that each thing you say is a reflection of your own site. Posting a foul comment on a blog you read only reflects on you. Each comment you post holds a link to your own blog site, or other place on the internet. Keep in mind that if you want to appear professional online you need to think before you type. People are not going to want to visit your site if they see vulgar comments written by you on another blog.
  • Avoid spamming people. Though commenting on other blogs helps to generate traffic to your own site avoid spamming blogs with your own link. If you want to place your link on a site it is best to first post a useful comment, and/or use the link only for relative material that relates to the post you have just read.
  • Share your thoughts and show the writer that you actually ‘read’ their post by writing a more in-depth comment than ‘good post’. Though ‘good post’ is a great pick-me-up, writers like to know what it was that you thought was ‘good’ about it. Try elaborating on your comments to make them more personal.

I am going to leave it at that for the moment, as I am sure that many of us don’t need this basic advice, but for those of you who do feel the need to be foul on other’s posts remember these actions reflect more on you than they do the writer…. Just a thought!

 

Cheers!

Children In Public (via DreamsEscapeMe)


I stumbled across the post below as I was browsing the Tags section of WordPress and I HAD to re-blog it here. As all of my readers know, I am an unconventional mother of two and the entire time I was reading this I was Laughing Out Loud. Check out the post below and keep an open mind as you read… Don’t get offended, Rather, see the humor in it… image (or remember) yourself as that innocent bystander… Love this post, it says what many of us think, but don;t have the guts to say out-loud!

Cheers!

Children In Public I get that kids are a fact of life, I really do. I also know how children are made. If you need me to explain it to you, and you are over the age of 12, you need more help than I can give you. And no, I am NOT going to provide an illustrated tutorial. In this day and age, however, even if you DO get pregnant unexpectedly, you ( at least in the U.S) have the choice to terminate the pregnancy if you are not ready for the responsibility of parenthoo … Read More

via DreamsEscapeMe

Not So Fortunate – The Truth is in the Cookie!


I got this prompt from Plinky.com and I thought it would make for a good blog post.

“You are now in charge of writing the fortunes in fortune cookies. Tell us our fortunes.”

So without a need for introduction here is what fortune cookies should say:

  • You will be hungry again in an hour
  • Nothing is going to change
  • No that pork chop was not supposed to be green
  • Chicken balls are not cat meat in disguise
  • You do love your husband, even if it doesn’t seem like it at the moment as you watch him inhale his fourth helping of meatballs
  • Children should never be brought to restaurants
  • You will have an upset stomach upon leaving the restaurant, we can not be held responsible.
  • You have something on your chin
  • The one-eyed man across the room is watching you
  • Yes the waitress is flirting with your boyfriend.
  • We saw how much food you wasted. There are children starving in Africa you know…
  • You should never where white out to dinner.
  • One more drink will help you feel better, honest!
  • Thanks for coming, we’ll see you again once you forget how much you hated the food here.
  • All you can eat is not an excuse to fill up on ice cream and desserts.
  • You possibly  just gained 12lbs during dinner.
  • Fortune cookies lie!

Six Reasons Why Summer Sucks…


We are well in to the summer months now, and I don’t know how it is at your house, but here we have pretty much had enough. I am one of those parents that believes summer vacation is far to long for kids (for me), and I am seriously considering circulating a petition to cut it’s length at least in half.

The beginning of summer is always great, full of plans and excitement. The days seem to fly by fast and there are endless amounts of things to do to keep the kids busy, but some time after the 4th of July and into the start of August (the hottest month of course) things seem to fall apart. You slowly begin to hear cries of ‘I’m bored‘ that get louder and more repetitive as days go on. Boredom and chaos seem to take over and your house goes from a happy, relaxing place to a war zone complete with water-guns, and water works.

Yup, it’s true, Summer is not all games and giggles, especially for us parents.

Here are just a few reasons that summer sucks:

  • Summer means no school, which in turn means that there are children everywhere. A once peaceful trip to the grocery store means tears, screams and battles. If you are lucky enough to be able to complete this task without your own kids in tow, you are not necessarily safe from the insanity. There are still other people’s children, and they are often worse than your own. You have to dodge out-of-control toddlers as they run down the aisles and pull cookies off the shelves (this is why some smart mother invented those ‘toddler leash’ contraptions), there are the children screaming that they want a treat, and if your really lucky there are the ones that throw themselves on the ground and kick/scream/hold their breath until they get that said treat. The convenience of  shopping first thing in the morning no longer holds that same peaceful escape, instead you are faced with parents who are walking zombies, delirious from lack of sleep and children who are even more exhausted and hungry for their morning helping of breakfast (a.k.a bowl full of sugar.) Often seen stumbling around the aisles, their children 20 feet behind with a candy bar in their mouths and a scowl on their faces, these parents (and kids) are one of the reasons summer sucks.
  • Summer = extra laundry. Funny thing this is, but it is true for everyone. Although we wear far ‘less‘ clothing in the heat of the simmer months, there always seems to be more laundry to do. Swimming, outdoor adventures and frozen treats mean that hampers all over the world are filling faster. Rising temperatures mean more daily outfit changes and piles of not-actually-dirty-but-thrown-on-the-floor-anyway, clothes that need to be cleaned. Summer means hot weather, hot weather means more laundry, laundry means drying, and we all know how hot the dryer makes the house… Just another one of those reasons that summer sucks.
  • Summer means vacation, and for many families this means travel. Travelling with children, even a short distance, is like trying to round up a pack of wild monkeys. If you are dumb enough crazy enough to attempt to travel by plane with children, you had better be prepared. Long lines, security check-points, and inevitable wait times mean a need for constant entertainment. Travelling by car holds its own obstacles and is no easier than travelling by plane, except the fact that it is less public and you have the option of stepping out of the car, feet securely on the ground. Travel during summer vacation means constant questions of ‘Are we there yet?‘ endless games of eye spy, and sibling battles that have you reaching a arm over the seat to swipe at the nearest child within reach. Travel comes with the guarantee of you saying, at least once, “If you don’t stop that I am going to turn this car around” and will almost surely have you in tears at the realization that you have in fact turned in to your parents. Travel, in some form, is inevitable during the warm weather, and is yet another reason that summer sucks for parents.
  • There is an elevated cost to summer vacation that is unavoidable. Even the most savvy parent feels the strain of summer when it comes to finances. There is the cost of added daycare should you not be lucky enough to get a ‘summer vacation’ from your work, there is added costs of food to fill active children’s stomachs, the cost of clothing for dirty/wet summer play, the added costs of utilities as the sprinkler is constantly on high and the cost of you cooling off the outdoors with your central air as children storm in and out of the house. Summer gets expensive when you add in the travel and the entertainment needs, and it is one more reason that summer seriously sucks for parents. 
  • When the children are home from school and are settling in for the dog days of summer you may find that you have suddenly become a full-time Molly Maid. Water play, and fun outdoors mean dirty foot prints on the floor. Frozen treats, and daily snacks mean finger prints and sticky messes that need to be cleaned. Hand in hand with excess laundry, summer brings an added mess. During the warmer weather months you will find yourself wasting away beautiful days scrubbing the floors or cleaning up arts and crafts that were never completed. Having kids home all-day, everyday, can be very overwhelming and the mess they bring is another reason that summer sucks for parents. 
  • Finally there is the need for constant entertainment. Once the novelty of summer vacation wears off, you will begin to here things like; “I’m Bored”, and “There’s nothing to do” spewing from your children’s mouths. It is at this point that you should panic, pack a bag and call in reinforcements (a.k.a grandparents) because unless you are one of those ‘perky-all-the-time’ parents that I hate, you are in for some trouble. There is no amount off coffee in the world that will better equip you for dealing with a ‘summer bored’ child. Creativity, (and a good hiding place) are your only tools in this battle. You might want to consider stocking up on energy drinks (and ear plugs) if your children are younger, or even moving house so that you are closely connected to a park. (but it better be a good park, one that constantly changes and creates new ways to climb and play. In fact, it should be magical, and have exotic animals that the kids can ride.) Boredom and lack of entertainment are just more reasons that summer sucks for parents. 

These are just a few of the many reasons that Summer sucks for parents there are many more that are not listed here.

Feel free to share your own in the comments section below, and don’t forget all the reasons that summer sucks for kids too(There is the boredom, messed up routine, lack of sleep, lack of gossip, swimming pools filled with piss and lost brain cells. Don’t get me wrong, I love the summer weather, just sans the kids and I’d be great.) 

For another great list of reasons that Summer Sucks check out The Insane Domain. The list posted there is guaranteed to make you giggle, and will probably have you nodding your head at the computer screen like a loser… 

Cheers!

Fame Claims Another Life – Amy Winehouse and the celebrity influence


If you follow the celebrity world, and even if you don’t, you are probably aware that singer Amy Winehouse was found dead in her London apartment July 23, after suffering a drug overdose. She was 27 years old.

Is this the role model you want for your daughter?

Amy Winehouse, born September 14, 1983, was most known for her song titled ‘Rehab‘ in which the young woman sings “They tried to make me go to rehab I said No, no, no.” Winehouse has battled an addiction publicly since she first entered the world of fame, and even had to cancel her European tour recently after a performance where she could only be described as “out of it.

Since her death headlines and status updates have declared “shock” and “bewilderment”. There has been an overwhelming amount of sadness and sympathy, fans, friends and other celebrities are remembering fondly the singers beautiful voice, but they are forgetting the facts…

Now I warn you in advance, this IS going to offend someone…

The truth is, there is NO shock. If you are shocked that a 27-year-old, heroin addict with more money than God died of an overdose you are living in a bubble and I am about to burst it.

This woman was not ‘fabulous, wonderful, or amazing’ as I have seen written on walls, statuses and pages all over the internet. She was a very messed up young girl that needed HELP not a record contract!!!

YES, it is sad that she died. Of course it is sad. I am a bitch, but I am not heartless, no one should have to suffer that way, but I don’t have sympathy because with all resources available in this world today, and especially with all the money she had, she could have gotten help for her addiction.

I’ll tell you what IS shocking….

It is shocking that every single day we as parents sit here and tell our children that drugs are bad. We tell them that drugs will get them nowhere in life, that drugs will kill them, that drugs will rip their future from them. We repeat constantly that if they do drugs they are doomed to be losers for life….

Yet, EVERYDAY our children are picking up magazines, watching television shows and listening to music that is promoting, creating and supporting celebrities on drugs...

Lindsay Lohan, Nicole Richie, and Paris Hilton are just the obvious examples. There are an ample number of celebrities that have been caught, or accused, of using drugs in the eyes of the media, and the eyes of our impressionable children.

The point is, These celebrities are supposed to be role models to our children. Young girls were watching Amy Winehouse, thinking she was cool, listening to her music, and aspiring to be like her…

Would you want your daughter looking up to a heroin addict?

Our children are looking up to all of these celebrities, turning to them for guidance, living life dreaming of being ‘just like them‘ one day, and they are not presenting a very good image for our children to mirror.

Cocaine, Heroin, DUI‘s and Hookers are the norm in the celebrity world today. Domestic violence, rehab and repeat offences have become our headline news. There is rarely consequence to the actions, unless it is the fate that Amy Winehouse has now suffered. Rarely do courts do more than give these celebrities a light slap on the wrist, allowing them to step out of court unscathed and teaching the teens that closely watch them that being famous means doing whatever you please without consequences.

Sure, you can argue that drugs have always been a part of Hollywood, but have they always been a part of your neighborhood to the extent that they are today? Children can get their hands on Cocaine easier than they can a basketball or jump-rope now a days, and Hollywood isn’t helping matters at all.

Amy Winehouse should be an example. Producers should consider more than the fact that someone has a good voice. A good voice is a dime a dozen, just look at American Idol. If an artist is going to be signed to a label, put in a film or shown on television they should not be high on drugs.

I can’t point blame at the producers, though I am sure the dollar signs may have blurred their insights, it is the artists and celebrities themselves that are to blame as well. You enter the world of fame knowing the costs associated with it, the lack of privacy and the pressure that come along with celebrity status. You make the choice to give up normality, you have no one but yourself to blame if you can’t handle the heat. You are a ‘role model‘ and whether you like it or not there are young people out there who are looking up to you. There are pre-teen kids who want to be like you, who watch you and mimic you. Celebrities: pull yourselves together and show them what they can be besides a heroin addicted whore.

Perhaps I am being harsh, but it truly makes me sick because there are thousands of aspiring artists, actors and singers out there that would gladly trade places with these spoiled little brats and never consider shoving a line up their nose or a needle in their arms. If fame makes you so miserable than stop working, singing, or acting and go home, go hide, or just go away. Ten other people ‘just like you’ will gladly take your place, and easily fill your shoes.

I am so sick of seeing headlines about celebrity arrests, drug overdoses and DUI’s. It is time that celebrities step up and show our kids what ‘hard work‘ and ‘dreams’ really are. It is time that they start standing up AGAINST drug use rather than promoting it. It is time they accept that they are role models to young boys and girls, and time they consider the consequences of their actions.

No offence to Amy Winehouse, of course she had talent, and clearly suffered from the disease that is addiction. She was a heroin addict that should have never had the opportunity to influence our children and when they tried to make her go to rehab she shouldn’t have said ‘No, no, no…

I Owe Toronto an Apology…


14 01 07 - Toronto Glitters

Image by Cliph via Flickr

Well, I admit it. I owe Toronto and apology! Apologizing and admitting that I was wrong have never really been my strong suit, but this time I think it is deserving. For many months now I have been ranting and raving about the bad parts of city living, and I have discovered that I am wrong… Yes, I said it. I am wrong! I admit it openly here for the world  see in black and white. (Wipe that smug smile off your face and I will explain myself. Oh, and don’t get comfortable with my apologies there won’t be many more…)

As I said, I have been ranting and raving about all the negatives that come along with city living. I have gone on and on about Toronto and the level of ignorance that the people here have… Now although much of what I said still holds strong, I owe an apology because my opinion was narrow-minded and I was not appreciating all the good this city has to offer.

For the last few weeks I have been going out of my way to travel and explore this city of 5.5 million people and I have discovered, and learned, many things.

  • I have learned that not everyone in Toronto is ignorant and self-absorbed. Though there are a great many of people who could benefit from common courtesy classes, not everyone is in it only for themselves, and there are a few kind souls in this city. I learned this by travelling alone with my children and trying to struggle to get up stairs at the subway stations. I will say a great number of people did walk (barge) right by us, but there were a number of passers-by that offered assistance as I struggled and even a few that went completely out of their way to help. I have to say that although many Toronto dwellers are cold and closed off, there are many people out there that are friendly and caring. I apologize to those people and only hope that their compassion and care rubs off on the rest.. and btw To all the rude people: Would it really kill you to smile, say hi, or step aside once in a while? Hold a door for someone, or offer up your seat? Take a second to be friendly, it might change your life… or someone else’s! 
  • I have learned that this city truly is beautiful. Though at times I feel like I am lost in a jungle of concrete buildings where heat seems to swell up from the depths of hell, there are parts of this city that are truly amazing. There are ample amounts of parks to enjoy, beautiful buildings to see and streets to explore. There is amazing art, diverse culture and every corner is like stepping into a whole new world. For not opening my eyes to the beauty before, I apologize, but for those of you that throw your trash on the side walks… pick it up and go to hell.
  • I have learned that although the traffic is bad, and the transit is packed it is a good system. The Toronto transit is one of the best, it is rarely running late and you never have to wait long. So, although I would avoid driving here at all costs, and I don’t much care for the transit because of all the people, when I do take the transit I don’t have to wait long and it is easy to use. For that I am thankful and I will apologize (partially, because many people here really don’t know how to drive and I am NOT sorry for saying that… The gas in on the ‘right’ people and yo u don’t need to constantly honk your horns!!)
  • I have learned that it is not the worst place in the world to live and that if you look you can find great deals. Just the other day I was complaining about the cost of living in the city, now I admit there are some prices here that will shock you to your core… I saw a one bedroom apartment yesterday that was listed at $2,900.00 per month and I almost died, but I have discovered that when you look for a deal there is one to be found in this city on almost anything… From books, to beds, to houses and cars the competition in this city means great deals for the penny savvy shopper. Set out to scour a deal and you will find one that pleases you. You may have to compromise, but you will find what you are looking for in the long run. So for this I apologize as well.
  • Lastly, I have learned that being in Toronto is like seeing the entire world all in one place. This city is probably one of the most diverse in the entire world. There are people from all walks of life moving along together. Each corner you turn brings you new smells, sights and sensations. There is culture and diversity like nothing I have ever seen, and it makes exploring this city an amazing adventure every time you step out your door. For this I am thankful… and I guess I apologize.
So there you have it Toronto. I have learned to appreciate many things in the last few weeks… I have seen that Toronto truly can be an amazing place. I will tell you that there are still a great deal of things I don’t like about this city, and I will never be able to handle the crowds or the constant chaos, but there is beauty deep within this city that touches your soul. There is amazing history and endless exploration that I can appreciate and enjoy. So, I apologize Toronto and I am glad that I finally opened my eyes, and my mind, to the beauty that is this city!