Well with 20 days until Christmas, (I know, I know, shut-up I am not ready, at all!) I guess it’s time I admit that winter is upon us. This is a difficult admission for me, you see, I HATE the cold. Absolutely despise it actually. I would rather be ravaged by flesh-eating zombies then endure the cold weather, slushy sidewalks, and mountains of snow that come along with living in Canada. In fact, I HATE winter so much that I am honestly convinced some one must have made a mistake, I was supposed to live somewhere in the Dominican, or at least somewhere that is mostly warm and sunny. There is no possible way that I should be living in Canada, the land of snow and sleet.
Perhaps I was switched at birth, some poor family visiting from Florida in November of 19….. well the exact year doesn’t matter, must have taken home a baby girl who is now sitting in the sun wishing she was snowboarding, and I am here dreaming of the beach….. it’s possible, right? I mean back then they were not so thorough with their infant protection policies, it could have easily occurred. The nurses could have been changing, or bathing, us and got confused…
“Um…which one is this?” One Nurse says to the other.
They look back and forth between the screaming infant girls in confusion.
“Not to sure,” replies the other nurse.”Doesn’t matter, just get her dressed and put her back in the crib. Who’s gonna notice, all babies look the same anyway.”
And just like that, little Mary-Sue, who is actually me, is whisked away to a warm paradise, and I am left shivering in the cold.
It COULD happen…I mean, it’s not impossible…..
The point is that I HATE winter, just HATE it, period. I have tried to enjoy it, tried to see the beauty in it. The dusting of snow on Christmas morning (OK I live in Ontario, northern Ontario, there is no dusting of snow, it is more like a pile of snow. A deep, wet, freezing pile that makes me sick to even think about.) I have tried winter sports such as; skiing, snowboarding, etc… to help pass the time during these colder months, but no amount of winter entertainment helps to erase my thorough bitterness towards this season. I just HATE winter.
And so having to now admit that winter has arrived, which of course I can no longer deny with bitter temperatures, and snowflakes falling from the heavens, is a very upsetting affair in my life. The arrival of winter means cold, which in turn means more clothing….and those who know me know how much I hate wearing layers. It means gloves and scarves, hats and snow boots, and for me it means two pairs of pants, three sweaters, extra socks, and still a chill in my bones… I just HATE it!!! I know I sound like one of those whiney children you shake your head at when you see them in the mall, begging their parents for the latest , coolest toy, like they deserve it just for surviving the trip down the birth canal…. but I can not put into words in any other way my total dislike for winter, and cold in general.
The worst part of the whole situation is, my son loves this weather. He will happily put on a hat, mitts and a parka, and play in the snow for hours at a time. He complains in the summer that it is too hot, and he can’t wait for the snow to return. He builds igloos, and snowmen, has snowball fights and makes snow-fortes. He would sleep out in his little winter wonderland if you let him. He begs me to come out and build a snow family with him, which I eventually do (mostly just to shut-him up, sometimes because I get the crazy thought in my head that it’s not that cold outside) but the result is always the same; after 5 agonizing minutes in the freezing temperatures, I drag myself back into the house with frozen fingers and blue lips. I make a steaming cup of coffee, and climb into a scorching bath, vowing never to leave the house again, or at least not until every flake of snow is melted.
I am a bit like a bear, actually I think I would enjoy being a bear. I could frolic all summer, eating, mating, and enjoying life. Fatten up in the fall, and sleep through the entire winter….. that is a nice thought. Unfortunately I can barely sleep through the night half the time, let alone an entire season…..
I just wish there was an alternative option… sure I could pack up and move to the land of palm trees, I would be quite content to have a green christmas, in fact it would not faze me one bit to decorate a palm tree to celebrate, but my whole family is here and I think my son would be devastated if he never saw snow again.
So instead I admit, rather reluctantly, that it is now official winter. I dig out the hats and the mittens, the scarf and the boots. I layer on the clothing, and I attempt to build a snowman. I freeze and I suffer, and I complain a lot. But my son smiles and the snow falls, and eventually winter turns to spring, which turns to summer, and we forget how awful last winter actually was until we do it all again.
Possibly, But Probably Un-Related Articles
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- Tips for Fighting Winter Woes (homesecuritysource.com)
- It’s December! Snow, snow and more snow!! – Stafford, United Kingdom (travelpod.com)
- Let It Snow! (mohighlibrary.wordpress.com)
- Snowy Winter Photography (noupe.com)
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